Hang With Me
by pulling-the-puzzles-apart
Summary: AU college - Nerd!Blaine meets Kurt online while he is studying at NYADA, Kurt is in LA studying at AMDA. Despite the distance they start up a friendship that could lead to so much more but can their love survive with over a thousand miles distance between them?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: **The story is back! This is the second fic I removed and originally had 10 chapters. I've nearly finished the whole fic so hopefully it will be completely up by the end of the weekend. As it only has two extra chapters added after the original, I thought it best to put it up all at once. Enjoy!

**Note for this story**: This is from a prompt by the awesome sararye again on tumblr and the post is number: 32462474145.

**Note for this chapter**: When the boys speak online Kurt is in _italics_ and Blaine is in _**bold italics**_.

* * *

Blaine had made it. The bright lights, the magnificent tall buildings of Time Square, the looming posters of the brightest stars on Broadway – one day his face would be gracing one of those posters and he would show his parents and all the people back home who had doubted him or thought his dream was unrealistic. He was a dreamer, he knew, but he dreamt big only because he was so desperate to get out and begin his life.

It had been easier than he thought getting into NYADA, the opinion of his peers so decidedly noncommittal when it came to his singing ability, he had really started to believe he was only slightly above average. His glee club were small, barely enough to enter competitions and their small town mentality had him desperate to leave, even if he had to claw his way out. He would make it, he promised himself, he would make it.

New York though was definitely lonelier than he had expected. Despite the fact he shared a dorm room with someone that had a girlfriend back home, their conversations whispered and hushed behind the pathetic divide Blaine had purchased, Blaine actually wished he would spend more time with him. His roommate seemed to have all the friends he needed and although he was cordial to Blaine, even on some occasions friendly, he rarely invited Blaine out with his friends. Unintentionally Blaine gave the impression, with his many books and love of his computer, that he was uninterested in making friends and always preferred his own company. Brad, his roommate, had waxed lyrical about his girlfriend's amazing body one evening until Blaine had quietly mentioned he was gay. That had caused a switch in Brad's behaviour too. Though it seemed unconsciously done, he had clearly decided Blaine was not 'one of the guys' and would therefore rather spend time alone.

He tried to go out, he really did. There were more gay bars than Blaine had ever dreamt of here in New York, but he felt a bit seedy and with his oversized glasses and curly dark hair he stood out for all the wrong reasons. And besides, there was reading to do for his NYADA classes, songs to learn and dance routines to perfect. If he concentrated on making his dream a reality, he wouldn't really miss the company, he was sure.

But weeks went by and he felt the loneliness creep under his skin when he was surrounded by crowds of students where people had quickly met like-minded friends and formed bonds. He tried to join a few clubs but his small town high school had not really prepared him for the mass of people and sycophantic behaviour. He'd rather chat online and find friends that understood.

Loneliness and crippling shyness often made him nervous in public situations but online he could be who he wanted to be, share his secrets and fears to some unknown and be able to eloquently explain himself without fear of ridicule. It was a safe place where if someone rejected him in any way he could press delete or unfollow. He could have amazing intellectual debates with people his age from all over the world about the merits of Katy Perry and Pink as artists with flair, could discuss the pros and cons of setting up life in a lighthouse or argue about gay rights with people that were interested. If he was honest, he lived for the hour or so each evening he went online to chat to his friends: people he had never met and who had no idea what he looked like.

He logged on that night, his roommate out with friends as usual, Blaine already in his monogrammed pyjamas and updating his profile, keeping his interests current. He noticed that someone had viewed it recently and left a comment on a picture he had reblogged of Christian Bale and Tom Hardy and he instantly smiled.

_What handsome chaps!_

Blaine instantly clicked on the profile to find it was a guy called Kurt who lived in LA and was a freshman at AMDA and studying musical theatre. There was no profile pic, only a gif of Lady Gaga in her infamous meat dress but he decided to press 'follow' and see where it took him.

* * *

What followed was casual. Blaine or Kurt would reblog romantic photos of places around the world as well as inspirational quotes and the occasional comment would be appear if a hot guy appeared on either of their dashboards. It transpired that Kurt was gay and admired Tom Hardy but didn't really understand Blaine's obsession when he had Christian Bale in similar photos. They lol'ed and added smileys, getting to know a little bit more about the other but it took a casual comment on a reblog that made their friendship just that little bit closer.

Kurt had posted a collection of pictures entitled 'sailor sweethearts' which had old black and white photos taken over a span of several years. All of the different sailors were couples in different poses of relaxation and sweetness. Some were hugging or kissing, looking so beyond happy that Blaine immediately smiled when he saw the pictures. One sailor was lifting up his male sweetheart and laughing towards the camera. Despite the fact that their relationships were outlawed at the time and a love like theirs frowned upon, all the couples looked happy and so in love. Blaine left a comment without hesitation:

_**These photos are so sweet. I wish I had a love like this. Thanks for sharing :)**_

Kurt received the comment, being online at the time, and smiled sadly. He wanted that too. He'd looked up Blaine quite a while ago and had found out that he was studying at NYADA and was his age.

_I love these pictures. I wish the same and I'm glad that even if it's slowly we're getting the same rights as everyone else._

Kurt hoped that Blaine wouldn't mind the assumption he was gay too but after all the comments and lusting after Tom Hardy, how could he not? Blaine didn't seem to mind:

_**Exactly! I think it's outrageous that it's taken so long but these pictures warm the heart a little. They show that nothing can stop a love that's strong. **_

Kurt smiled again. He took a chance and did what he had wanted to do for quite a while. He loaded the chat app and started a conversation with Blaine:

_Hi, it's Kurt. I hope you don't mind I thought it might be easier to chat on here rather than through comments on the pictures. _

_**Hi Kurt! No I think it's a great idea. I saw on your profile that you study at AMDA? I'm at NYADA and I think we do similar courses?**_

_Yeah I'm at AMDA and study musical theatre. Is NYADA just as hard work as AMDA?! I feel like I'm always singing and acting here!_

_**Yeah it's hard here too but I love it! I love singing and acting a part and music just speaks to me above everything else. Do you want to end up on Broadway?**_

_I'd love to end up on Broadway! I probably chose the wrong college for that, you seem like you'd have more chance to audition for roles while you study? _

_**Yeah I do but I haven't so far. I think I'll wait until next year when I know a bit more. Have you auditioned for anything yet?**_

_No not yet. There are more opportunities for TV and film here and at least I'm close to my dad. _

_**Does he live in LA too?**_

_Yeah not too far from me which is really good. He was ill last year when I started to apply and I didn't want to be so far away from him in New York though I really wanted to apply to NYADA. It seems a great place to learn our craft._

_**It is, I do love it. I love looking up at all the posters and buildings in Times Square and hoping and wishing for the future but it gets a little lonely here. Is your dad better now?**_

_Yeah much better. He had cancer but is in remission now. The treatment worked. He had a heart attack a couple of years ago and I couldn't bear the thought that I might lose him. I couldn't be away from him. _

_**You're a really good son. Do you have any brothers or sisters?**_

_No, just a step-brother when my dad re-married._

Blaine wanted to ask where Kurt's mum was but hesitated, thinking it was too personal. In the end Kurt told him.

_My mum died when I was eight._

Blaine paused for the longest time, not knowing what to write and he left it so long that Kurt became worried.

_Blaine?_

_**Sorry I was thinking. I'm really sorry to hear about your mum Kurt.**_

_Thanks._

_I mean it was a long time ago and I try to surround myself with memories so I don't forget how perfect and beautiful she was but it's sometimes hard._

_**I can only imagine. **_

_I have to go now, Rachel, my roommate, is calling me for dinner. Chat tomorrow?_

_**That'll be great! Same time, same place.**_

"Why do you have such a smile on your face?" Rachel asked as soon as Kurt entered the kitchen to take his plate.

"No reason really, I was just chatting online."

"Oh," Rachel said knowingly and smiled.

"Nothing like that," Kurt said, sitting down at the table and starting his meal. "I don't even know what he looks like. This tastes amazing by the way. Thanks for cooking."

Rachel smiled and nodded. She'd let Kurt eat in peace this time and ask him more about this mysterious guy another time.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Blaine**_ and _Kurt_

**Warning**: I deal with Finn's death in this chapter, in a similar way to the episode, but it's there nonetheless.

* * *

Daily conversations between them were light and airy, full of crush conversations and moaning about workload. They compared song choices for performances they were to give or assignments planned and written together. They discovered a mutual love of Disney as well as musical theatre, hence their college courses, and Blaine found himself looking forward to his daily time chatting with Kurt online. It wasn't unusual for Blaine to reblog Kurt's posts or vice versa: pictures or gifs of artistic places or images, Vogue spreads and famous crushes and although it was nothing strange for Blaine to talk to people online, Kurt was the only one he chatted with regularly. Until one day it stopped.

* * *

There was only one time during the day that Blaine would remove his glasses apart from bedtime: singing class. He would sing whatever had been rehearsed with the group then when asked to prepare solos he would stand, see the hazy shapes of the people before him and sing for all he was worth. It didn't matter what their expressions were, it didn't matter what they did, he would sing like there was no tomorrow.

So he sang, glasses off, sat by the piano and played without noticing how his small audience reacted.

They clapped as soon as he was finished, his glasses back on. They looked a little awe-struck but one or two looked at him with suspicion as if he might be the competition to beat. He smiled sweetly and took his seat to wait for the next performance.

He hadn't heard from Kurt for nearly two weeks, had seen no comments on his blog and he hadn't posted anything. Blaine had left it, not tried too hard for contact but he wondered if he was ok, if Blaine had said anything to offend him or if he needed some kind of help. Blaine knew he was more likely to be overworked but Kurt had always made time for Blaine in the evening, knowing how important online friendship was to him and never wanting to disappoint.

He logged on that evening and found that Kurt had reblogged his collection of gifs of rain that he had posted a couple of days ago. Kurt had left a simple comment:

_These are beautiful. I think unfortunately I feel the rain, I'm not just wet. _

Blaine immediately recognised the Bob Marley quote and went to online chat.

_**Hi Kurt, hope you're ok? **_

_Hi Blaine, I've been better but thanks for asking._

_**What's wrong? Anything I can help you with?**_

_Not really, I lost someone really important to me a couple of weeks ago and not sure how I'm going to live without them. They were blood but not blood. _

_**Finn?**_

_Did you hear?_

_**No but I guessed when you said about blood but not blood. **_

_He died and I don't really know how life goes on. It does of course and I'm back to classes and singing and dancing but it's all a bit grey and meaningless. _

_**I'm so sorry Kurt, I really am. I know that's empty…**_

_No it's not empty, I appreciate it._

_Rachel, my roommate, has found it hardest. She was his girlfriend and nothing can bring him back. I feel so useless._

_**Sometimes just being there for a person can help, just listening, just holding tight. **_

_Yeah, I know you're right but I wish I could take away all the pain. My high school music teacher is holding a memorial next week, so I'll be going home again. _

_**Will you sing for him?**_

_I don't know if I can but I'll sing with the others. Music has a strange way of uniting people and helping you to feel and express yourself when there are no words._

_**Rain is like that too.**_

_I like your gifs of the rain. It really is beautiful – rain, I mean._

_**Yeah I like just standing in it, letting it wash over me, make me so wet that I start to shiver but then standing under a hot shower afterwards makes it all better. Cups of tea and autumn leaves are perfect too.**_

_Where have you been all my life Blaine?!_

_**In a small town in Ohio, then New York?**_

_Yes that's where you've been… I think I need to sleep. I haven't slept in so long._

_**You can try to sleep now?**_

_Yeah I'm in bed already, such an old man in my pyjamas!_

_**Same here! College is tiring!**_

_What's your day been like?_

_**The usual. I sang in class and had to act out a traumatic experience. **_

_What did you sing? I'd like to hear you sing._

_**Well you can if you like *shrugs***_

_Don't *shrug* at me Blaine! How could I hear you sing?_

_**I have a webcam but I could turn the camera part away so you just hear the sound?**_

_You don't want me to see your face?_

_**No it's not that, it's just a bit weird now. I hardly know you.**_

_I know I keep forgetting that... The webcam idea sounds good though. _

_**Ok let me set it up…**_

_**Right all ready… I'll just sing what I sang earlier, hope it's ok…**_

_I'm sure it will be, you got into NYADA after all._

_**Hard to know, maybe if I'd skim the stone,**_

_**Walk a different way back home, it would all make sense.**_

_**Or shut my eyes, could lose myself in teenage lies.**_

_**If I fell in love a thousand times, would it all make sense?**_

_**Cause I've been feeling pretty small,**_

_**Sometimes feel like I'm slipping down walls**_

_**And every line I ever get a hold it seems to break.**_

_**Called you up and I could tell you just how much,**_

_**No, maybe I'll just get drunk and it will all make sense.**_

_**Or if I weren't so nice, I'd convince my friends that you aren't right**_

_**I could promise you my heart don't cry, but would it all make sense?**_

_**Cause I, I've been feeling pretty small,**_

_**Sometimes feel like I'm slipping down walls**_

_**And every line I ever get a hold it seems to break.**_

_**Oh I, I've been feeling pretty small,**_

_**Sometimes feel like I'm slipping down walls**_

_**And every line I ever get a hold it seems to**__**break.**_

_**Kurt?**_

_That was beautiful_

_**Thank you**_

_You sang that in class?_

_**Yeah, today. It's my favourite class and it's the only time I can really feel alive. I love that song and today just felt like that kind of song.**_

_I know what you mean. It reminds me of rain._

_**Me too.**_

_I feel sleepy now, thanks Blaine._

_**You're welcome Kurt. Speak soon?**_

_Yeah… speak soon x_

* * *

**A/N**: The rain gif I mention is already on my tumblr. Thanks for reading :)

**Song/people quoted**:

'Sense' by Tom Odell

"Some people feel the rain, others just get wet" by Bob Marley.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Blaine**_ and _Kurt_

**A/N:**All the photos I use are on my tumblr and belong to James Maher. Yogurt the pirate dog is an instagram account!

* * *

Kurt never intended to remain in California, but once Burt and Carole had moved there from Ohio for Burt's health he couldn't bear the thought of leaving to go to the opposite coast. He'd always dreamed of New York: the darkness of the looming buildings, the rain and the constant buzz. Photos and his favourite films always gave the impression that things were moving in New York, people were achieving, no one was sleeping. Kurt wanted to be a part of that but sunny, optimistic LA would have to do for now. New York wouldn't wait but some things were more important. Just like friendship.

He'd never asked Rachel to go with him to AMDA, her dream was so obviously New York and Broadway that he would never even suggest LA, but Finn had wanted to set up a business with Puck and it had seemed a good idea to her too at the time. In their current situation, missing Finn, singing songs that would never bring him back, Rachel and Kurt were glad they had started in LA and had spent as much time with Finn as possible. It had cemented Finn and Rachel's relationship, brought them back where they had been before the summer of the army adventure and Rachel had at least good memories to fall asleep to each night as she lay in Finn's old T-shirts.

But upon his return from Mr Schue's memorial week at glee club, Kurt looked at the sunny happiness of LA, the health conscious people around him and all the beauty. He desperately wanted to visit New York to see what he was missing out on and go to a place where reality, cutting edge fashion and witty humour were encouraged. He couldn't bear the perfection of LA anymore.

Blaine, without realising Kurt's disillusionment with LA, had posted photos he had taken on his wanderings around New York, showing his natural eye for catching glimpses of light in strange places and spotting people in amazing poses. He had deliberately avoided contacting Kurt in order to give him the space he needed to grieve with friends and family but he so desperately needed to get out of his dorm. Brad, his roommate, was constantly out of the their room with friends or presumably drinking and Blaine had only his books and music to keep him company. He had been given a top-notch camera as a leaving present from Cooper and he wanted to use it. Photography kept him occupied when there was nothing else to do, when he didn't want to sit in his lonely room anymore and wait for something to happen. He would post his best shots online and the more he took, the more he was able to see the unusual and catch people in unexpected poses. He would wonder about the characters he saw, what they were thinking in that exact moment when the camera caught them unaware, what had just happened in their lives. It became an obsession to take the perfect shot, reflect only truth and it was soon his most favoured hobby.

After another two weeks of silence from Kurt, Blaine posted a picture that he had taken in Grand Central Station of a tourist patiently waiting; in fact she was so still she looked afraid to move. He experimented with time-lapse exposure and took many shots of the lonely woman. Blaine had watched her for a while, saw no one approach her and after he took the photos she eventually went out on her own. Blaine was secretly impressed with his luck on the photo when he saw it and posted it immediately online.

He received many amazed comments from people he knew online asking him to explain how he had achieved such a perfect shot. He explained as best he could but it was a few days later that Kurt saw it and commented.

_This is really haunting. I love the shot and it is amazing but so dreadfully sad I find it hard to look at. _

_**I'm amazed I managed to create it! I know what you mean… I find myself staring at the photo constantly. **_

_It is fantastic Blaine, you definitely have a talent. I wonder who she is…._

_**I have no idea. She was a tourist I think, no one collected her, though she waited for at least half an hour. She was so still.**_

_I think that's what I find sad, I couldn't bear to be that still. Look at all the movement around her, all the action she's missing out on._

_**Is that your greatest fear?**_

_Yes._

It became something of a habit now that Kurt appeared to be back online in the evening, that Blaine post his best photo of the day and eagerly awaited a comment from Kurt. Eventually Blaine would post instantly on his phone when he didn't have his camera and he saw something that he couldn't miss and Kurt set his phone so he would be instantly alerted if Blaine posted. He replied so quickly that Blaine started posting more in the hope that he would notice again.

Blaine was walking around by the Plaza hotel after a class when he noticed the sky seemed to change. It darkened, a group of birds seemed to be desperate to escape and he quickly took out his phone, kneeled on the ground, surprising tourists nearby and took as many shots as his slower phone would allow. He changed the filter and posted it instantly online causing Kurt to immediately get out his phone to see what the alert was. He smiled in the middle of theatre class where he could surreptitiously sneak his phone under the table, the only class where he wasn't in a studio.

_Wow, just wow…_

_**I just saw the sky change, it's amazing here!**_

_Is that the Plaza?_

_**Yeah, my dream wedding destination for sure.**_

_Definitely! I always thought Carrie and Big should have married there. Hubbell missed a trick._

_**I love that film! **__**Memories… like the corners of my mind…**_

… _Misty water-colored memories. Not many people watch those films now, 'The Way We Were' is such a classic. _

_**Oh I've seen loads of classics. There's nothing quite like an old fashioned diva. In fact I saw that there was a showing of All About Eve that I was going to see, all on my lonesome :(**_

_Did you just do a sad face at me Blaine?! I so wish I could fly over there right now, I LOVE that film!_

_**Me too and sorry about the sad face, just sad no one else appreciates it like we do.**_

_Well you could live message the film, that way I'll enjoy it from many miles away._

_**I never have any wi-fi in the theatre, it's a little old.**_

_Text?_

There was silence on Blaine's end; no beep alert for a message for a couple of minutes and Kurt desperately wanted to erase his last suggestion. He loved talking to Blaine but to have his number? Surely that was going too far and he hardly knew him. He was about to write that Blaine should ignore his last message when Blaine simply wrote his number.

Blaine had been surprised by the suggestion, but as he thought it through he wondered why not. He had told Kurt his whole life history in the space of a few weeks and although Kurt had had difficulties to go through himself, he had taken an interest and had shared his own secrets. Blaine messaged his number before he had time to consider the consequences, though he heard his dad's reprimanding voice clearly in his head.

Kurt allowed a whole minute of silence, then… he messaged his number too. Blaine breathed a sigh of relief.

_You should definitely live text the film, I'm so bummed I'm missing it. _

_**You'd fly out to New York just to see that?!**_

_Not just to see that…_

* * *

_**Fasten your seatbelts, it's going to be a bumpy night!**_

_Are you there now?_

_**Yeah, just sat down with my candy, popcorn and pop. So excited!**_

_Are you really five?!_

_**When it comes to classic movies… yes! I always remember watching them when I was a kid with my mom, I think it brings back repressed feelings. **_

_I watched it with my mom too. I think I was sick off school one day. _

_**What was your mom like?**_

_**If you don't mind me asking…**_

_No I don't mind… she was beautiful, graceful but then she would laugh at one of my dad's jokes and it was a proper loud cackle where you could see all her teeth. She was great._

_**That sounds like a perfect description of a person, I would have loved to meet her.**_

_She would have loved you I think._

_Isn't the film starting?_

_**Yeah, the lights have dimmed but I'm sitting in the back row so the light from my phone isn't going to bother anyone.**_

_Is anyone making out in the back row?!_

_**I haven't checked!**_

_**Not yet but there is a couple on the other side of my row. They look at me every so often… I think they're checking me out to see whether I'm a pervert!**_

_And are you?!_

_**NO! I take offence at that!**_

_Sorry… but you are in the back row…_

_**I was being considerate! **_

_Ok I'll let you off._

_**Dear Margo. You were an unforgettable Peter Pan. You must play it again soon. I love the tiger…**_

_In 'The Jungle Book'? You do know your Disney._

_**Of course *hurt expression***_

_Oh don't pout. I've never seen your face but I get the impression I couldn't allow you to pout. Do you look like a wounded puppy when you're sad?_

_**How did you know?!**_

_Thought so *satisfied smile* :)_

_Have you seen the pictures of the pirate __Chihuahua called Yogurt?_

**_No!_**

_**I don't look like Yogurt, he's too cute.**_

_But you concede that you look like a puppy when you pout?!_

_**Maybe… ;)**_

_**If nothing else, there's applause... like waves of love pouring over the footlights and wrapping you up.**_

_Eve?_

_**Yep… she sounds a bit Gaga there…**_

_Are you Gaga or Katy?_

_**Do I even need to say?!**_

_Katy?_

_**Affirmative. I take it from your profile you're a Gaga?**_

_Yes, every day is a day to search for applause and a chance to dress and impress. I often think WWGD._

_**What Would Gaga do?**_

_Correct Mr…_

_**Anderson, but don't call me that.**_

_Daddy-issues?!  
_

_**Yes**_

_Oh… sorry Blaine I was only teasing I didn't mean anything by it._

_**Don't worry, no offence taken, I just never want to be associated with him. **_

_Want to talk about it?_

_**Not really but only because I don't want to ruin this virtual theater trip :)**_

_It's almost like a date!_

As soon as it left his mind, ran from his fingers onto his text, Kurt closed his eyes in panic. You couldn't erase a text, couldn't intercept a stupid joke and Blaine didn't reply straight away. Kurt's study books were forgotten as he lay sprawled on his bed awaiting a text from Blaine.

_**A very strange date where we're miles apart!**_

_**It could be though…**_

_I think I'd have to see you first._

Another moment of silence, a time where Kurt could feel the swirl in his stomach and his breath stopped.

_**Well it has been two months, maybe we could skype?**_

_**Don't worry if you'd rather not, I mean I know it's strange and you live in LA and I live in New York and…**_

_Blaine?_

_**Yes?**_

_You're rambling… I think skype sounds great. When you get back from the theater I'll have finished studying if you wanted to do it then?_

_**Sounds cool. See you then!**_

_See you then!_

_Bye Blaine_

_**Bye Kurt **_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Blaine**_ and _Kurt_

* * *

Blaine was nervous.

He had walked home from the theater after catching a bus only half of the journey, his leg bouncing up and down so much it worried the guy sitting nearby. His nervous energy hadn't dissipated by the time he had got home, despite the brisk walk in the cold air, and he made a decaffeinated coffee, only to pour boiling water on the kitchen counter. He took it to his dorm room, grateful that Brad was out, and booted up his laptop.

His fingers twitched over the keys and instead of watching the chat option or his skype page, he looked online to posts that were reblogged and comments on pictures he had posted. It made him smile that he made a little impact, that regular people spotted his news online and seemed to like his efforts in photography. He briefly wondered if any of them would be friends in real life but then smiled that it didn't matter. Friends that commented were still friends though only at a surface level. His eyes would go every so often to the skype icon on his desktop and he would watch for a new caller. Just as he realised he also had the opportunity to initiate the call, Kurt called him and waited.

Blaine let his fingers hover over the mouse on his laptop for just a few seconds before he pressed the accept button.

Kurt's face didn't appear like he had expected. Instead the uniform dark blue screen appeared with a simple icon Kurt used on many of his online forums. Blaine was surprised then messaged, typing rather than revealing his voice.

_**Kurt?**_

_Hi Blaine_

_**Are you ok?**_

_**Kurt?**_

_Sorry, just packing all my books away. How was the end of the movie?_

_**Great, thanks. I do love Bette Davis very much.**_

_We will have to have the movie diva discussion soon._

_**Do you have a lot of work? I don't want to keep you.**_

_Don't be silly, I get to finally see your face and have a proper chat. I wouldn't turn that down for silly essays on the history of the theater!_

_**Is it silly that I'm nervous?**_

_**It is silly isn't it? **_

_No I know it's silly but I'm nervous too. I feel like I know your face already, I've spoken to you for so long…_

_That sounds silly, doesn't it?_

_**No I feel the same! **_

_**Maybe we should describe the picture we have in our head of what the other person looks like. It'll be funny!**_

_You better not picture a hunky blonde or a Tom Hardy look-a-like… I will cause much disappointment, I'm sure._

_**You go first, what do you think I look like?**_

_Why do I get to go first?! What if I insult you? _

_**You won't. What do you imagine I look like?**_

_**Kurt?**_

_I'm thinking…_

_I picture you thinking most of all, I think. I already know you wear glasses and I'm guessing they're big, maybe too big for your face and you have dark hair but I'm playing it safe!_

_**Good guesses.**_

_Well?_

_**Well what?**_

_Are you going to tell me if I'm right?!_

_**No, you'll have to wait and see! Do you want to me to tell you how I picture you?**_

_Be nice…_

_**Of course.**_

_**I think you have blue eyes, I don't know why. Do you?**_

_You'll have to wait too…_

_**Meany…**_

_Justice is served. _

_**Do you want to switch the webcam on?**_

_Do you?_

_This is silly. People meet all the time and loads of people chat online, it doesn't matter if we were strangers before. _

_**I know, exactly. People meet everyday. **_

_**Maybe we should count to three?**_

_Ten?_

_**Ok… ten, nine, eight…**_

_Seven, six, five…_

_**Four, three, two…**_

_One_

_**One**_

The images flickered once the webcams were moved, correctly revealing both faces fully on the computer screen and breathing hitched. Blaine was surprised. Although he had guessed correctly, he wasn't expecting such eyes of blue green grey that made him immediately search his mind for a defining colour. He had no idea that Kurt was trying to fathom the colour of his eyes too.

"Oh hi," Kurt breathed after a while and a nervous giggle escaped his lips. "Not what you were expecting?" Blaine said when he had finally realised his mouth was slightly open.

"Oh no, well I wasn't sure what to expect," Kurt said, slightly flustered and sitting up in his chair. "Do I disappoint?"

"No definitely not," Blaine said, eagerly coming forward in his chair so his face suddenly loomed a little bigger and then he realised how it sounded and tried to backtrack. "I mean I'm not sure what I was expecting."

Kurt laughed again.

"Well hi," he said and he tried to extend his hand by touching the screen, "Nice to finally meet you Blaine."

Blaine stretched his hand out too and pretended to shake it, beaming a bright smile. He really wasn't sure what he was expecting but those eyes of blue, the perfectly coiffed hair and the sweet button nose caused his heart to stop a beat. Kurt was really far more beautiful then he could ever imagine.

"Nice to meet you too," Blaine said, "I was right about the eyes." He smiled though he would never say that they were so much more than simply blue.

"And I was right about the glasses," Kurt said smiling, "They really suit you."

Blaine grimaced. "No they don't," he said, "But I've got used to them now I guess."

"Have you ever considered contacts?" Kurt suggested, then backtracked again. "I mean if your glasses make you feel uncomfortable."

"Yeah I guess I could," Blaine said, seriously pondering the option.

"Let me see your eyes without them," Kurt suddenly said and with nervous fingers Blaine took them off, waiting patiently for Kurt's opinion.

Kurt swallowed.

"You should definitely get contacts," Kurt finally said then he changed the subject, leaving Blaine a little surprised.

"Is your roommate around?"

"No, he's out," Blaine said, "Is Rachel in?"

Kurt nodded his head. "She's in bed, still not feeling right after Finn."

Blaine nodded sadly. "I don't even know how that must feel, I can't even imagine."

Kurt said nothing, a lump forming in his throat.

"Life's short," Blaine said sadly, his eyes flitting wherever they could, never focusing on Kurt's face. "I waste mine."

Kurt frowned slightly, his face showing his confusion.

"Why do you say that? You're living my dream Blaine," he said, "You're in New York, you get to see and photograph amazing places and people as well as sing and hopefully make it big on Broadway or whatever you put your mind too. You're in the place of dreams."

Blaine's smile grew on him like a slow wave.

"I never thought of it like that," Blaine said, "I guess I worry that my shyness has ruined so many opportunities."

"What do you mean?" Kurt asked.

"I sing, dance, perform when I have to and in the privacy of my dorm room, only when I'm on my own. I never come out of my comfort zone, never challenge myself. I'm just a curly haired baby with over-sized glasses and a shyness that cripples me."

"But your voice is amazing," Kurt exclaimed, "You pretty much sang me to sleep after a stressful and beyond sad week, Blaine. I don't think your shyness can stop real talent."

"But that's in the safety of my room, doing what I know I'm good at. I don't challenge myself, I don't push my boundaries. I just am."

"There's nothing wrong with that."

"I know but I don't want to grow stale and boring. Don't you want to be the best version of yourself?"

Blaine would never know, after conversations with Rachel, how fitting his saying was and how desperate Kurt was to improve and become better. He knew he'd become boring, safe in the knowledge that he was successful in areas he wanted to be and nothing more. Rachel demanded change and improvement and Kurt didn't want to be left behind.

"Yeah," Kurt simply said, "You're right." He nodded slowly, letting his idea manifest itself fully then he smiled. "I think we can help each other."

"What do you mean?" Blaine asked.

"Set each other challenges, make sure we get evidence that we were successful, push our boundaries," Kurt said excitedly. His face lit up and he edged closer to the screen. "Yeah I get it now, we need to push each other and make sure we do certain challenges that will make us better performers and artists. You know that One Republic song 'Counting Stars'? It's like that – 'everything that kills me makes me feel alive'."

Blaine thought it over.

"So we set challenges for each other and collect evidence? What kind of challenges?" Blaine asked.

"I don't know," Kurt said, thinking. "Costumed performances, imitations of artists we admire but are completely different from our own style, public performance? Anything and everything." Kurt was now in his element and was getting excited at the thought.

"I don't know…" Blaine said, his voice trailing away in trepidation.

"It's perfect Blaine," Kurt said, "Rachel said I was becoming boring and I know my routine has become stale and predictable. I need to mix it up, I need to become the better version of myself."

Blaine smiled ruefully. He knew his phrase would turn around and bite him.

"Can I go first?" he said nervously, "Can I set you a challenge first?"

"Of course," Kurt said smiling, "But we must provide evidence of meeting the challenge. We can't just take our word for it."

"Of course," Blaine said nodding solemnly.

"So what's the first challenge?" Kurt said eagerly. Blaine thought about it, not wanting to suggest something too risky or nerve wracking. He smiled as the perfect suggestion came to mind.

"Singing," Blaine said and Kurt's face fell that it would be so ordinary and well within his comfort zone. "Singing on the subway," Blaine finished. "I challenge you to sing randomly on the train, out loud and without warning. A song of your choice."

Kurt's eyes widened but he nodded, apparently accepting the challenge.

"How do I record the challenge whilst singing?"

"Press record on your video phone and press it into someone's hand, insist they record and sing your heart out."

Kurt's eyes darted to several places on the screen as he planned and went through song lists in his head. He smiled.

"Challenge accepted Blaine Anderson."

Blaine beamed.


	5. Chapter 5

_**Blaine**_ and _Kurt_

* * *

Kurt was on the train like agreed, all preparations made, but he couldn't do it. He clung onto the handrail in the middle of the train, his knuckles now white and he took quick furtive glances around at the people surrounding him. They looked positively bored and in many ways in dire need of entertainment but Kurt was afraid to push in case they reacted in a very different way. The train was peaceful though dull and he was about to disturb that.

He took a deep breath and felt his heart start to race but he started the music on his speaker. A few startled passengers looked up at the noise, amazed that someone had been so rude on the train but Kurt had a split second to realise that this was his chance and he should take it, if only for the new friend he had made with the honey-coloured eyes and the sweet smile. He pressed record on his phone, remained where he was and started to sing.

_I used to bite my tongue and hold my breath_

_Scared to rock the boat and make a mess_

_So I sat quietly, agreed politely_

People had noticed he had started to sing and were staring incredulously, as if they doubted the words were coming from him and not the speaker. Kurt thrust his phone into the hand of an older lady on the train who looked confused but knew enough about the device to start videoing it all successfully.

_I guess that I forgot I had a choice_

_I let you push me past the breaking point_

_I stood for nothing, so I fell for everything_

Kurt started to get a little more confident when he thought of Blaine and how he would smile so widely at his achievement. It didn't matter that people were looking at him strangely. The lady was still recording and a few younger people had started to laugh, so remaining in sight of the phone he started to act the part.

_You held me down, but I got up (HEY!)_

_Already brushing off the dust_

_You hear my voice, you hear that sound_

_Like thunder gonna shake the ground_

He skipped around the handrail with a beaming smile and looked up at the ceiling of the train as if he finally saw, finally understood what life was all about.

_You held me down, but I got up (HEY!)_

_Get ready 'cause I've had enough_

_I see it all, I see it now_

He started the chorus with confidence and another grin towards the phone and the people that were watching.

_I got the eye of the tiger, a fighter, dancing through the fire_

_'Cause I am a champion and you're gonna hear me roar_

_Louder, louder than a lion_

_'Cause I am a champion and you're gonna hear me roar_

_Oh oh oh oh oh oh_

_Oh oh oh oh oh oh_

_Oh oh oh oh oh oh_

_You're gonna hear me roar_

He really felt he was roaring and people laughed, loving his theatricality and confidence. No longer were people annoyed, even the initially grumpy passengers now seemed to be entertained and Kurt briefly took the phone so he could catch a glimpse of a few of his audience.

_Now I'm floating like a butterfly_

_Stinging like a bee I earned my stripes_

_I went from zero, to my own hero_

_You held me down, but I got up (HEY!)_

_Already brushing off the dust_

_You hear my voice, you hear that sound_

_Like thunder gonna shake the ground_

_You held me down, but I got up (HEY!)_

_Get ready 'cause I've had enough_

_I see it all, I see it now_

People had started to join in, singing and shuffling on their feet, even the more world-weary passengers, tired after a day at work, bopped their hips in time to the music or moved their shoulders.

_I got the eye of the tiger, a fighter, dancing through the fire_

'_Cause I am a champion and you're gonna hear me roar_

_Louder, louder than a lion_

'_Cause I am a champion and you're gonna hear me roar_

_Oh oh oh oh oh oh_

_Oh oh oh oh oh oh_

_Oh oh oh oh oh oh_

_You're gonna hear me roar_

Kurt finished superbly and with a final wink to his video phone he took the device from the lady. He turned around, holding out the video so he could record himself and those behind him.

"This has been a challenge for the one and only Blaine Anderson," Kurt said, his teeth showing, he was smiling so widely. "Challenge delivered." And with a final round of applause from those gathered around him he switched it off.

* * *

Blaine beamed. He had received the instant notification on his phone and watched as he was about to start making lunch. He stood in the communal kitchen and laughed out loud at the end as Kurt had so confidently said: "challenged delivered" and smiled into the video on his phone. He text Kurt immediately.

_**That was awesome! Well done Kurt – I'm very proud :)**_

_You watched it! I was so nervous but the thrill as you perform in public is like no other – I seriously advise you to do it sometime._

_In fact I've just realised it's my turn to challenge ;)_

_Ooh what shall I ask you to do… so many possibilities…_

_**Tease! Don't leave me waiting too long, waiting makes me nervous :(**_

_**The crowd seemed to like what you did. Were they tough?**_

_To start with, but I warmed them up! I think I confused the lady that videoed me._

_**She was a partaker of history – I think she'll survive ;)**_

_**Seriously Kurt, I thought it was amazing and you sound beautiful. You have such an unique voice.**_

_Is that code for girly?!_

_**What?! No! It is higher than mine but it is perfect and you sound very classically trained. I know you'll go far.**_

_Do you just want to be a singer? Broadway? What are your dreams?_

_**I want to sing mainly but I think performing comes so close to true singing that I want to do it all. I'd love to be on Broadway but I think I just want to be heard.**_

_I really get that. I think I want to be on Broadway but the thought of being heard when so many people have thought I wasn't worth listening to in the past… well let's just say I want to show them._

_**I really can't believe that people thought you weren't listening to. You seem so confident when you perform, that's what I loved. When you sang Roar you didn't care what anyone thought. **_

_I hid all the nerves – I must have been better at acting than I thought! I get nervous too Blaine, I just pretend and in that moment when the lights are on me, or everyone is watching, I become exactly what I want them to think I am. _

_**I get so nervous when I introduce myself I almost stutter.**_

_Then don't introduce yourself – let the music speak for itself._

_**I don't know how I would do that. Don't I want people to know who I am?**_

_They will._

Blaine let Kurt's text wash over him for a moment. The thought that he didn't need to tell everyone that he existed was strangely freeing.

_Are you free tonight?_

_**Yeah, why?**_

_Go to Central Park – near the Dana Discovery Center. Your mission will become clear when you get there._

_**This is a challenge?**_

_Yes, a very important one. And remember you don't need to introduce yourself, but somehow make sure you video it all._

* * *

Blaine walked the familiar paths and the Bow Bridge that was well lit and beautifully stoic as if nothing could knock it down. Blaine let the nerves vanish as he walked over the bridge, felt his confidence rise as he ascended and went over the top. The view as usual was breathtaking and he tried desperately to prepare himself to sing in public.

The park wasn't deserted but only a few people were walking or sat at benches appreciating the peace and quiet of the park, which was normally packed and too full. He knew at this time he wouldn't have an enormous audience but the act of playing, where piano keys would resonate and be clearly heard amongst the trees, would still be nerve-wracking. He took a deep breath and looked around for what Kurt must have been talking about and he suddenly saw.

The piano was mainly purple with blue swirls making it appear like magic in the dark. There was a light nearby that shone brightly over the area around the piano and Blaine took his seat in the spotlight. He knew this was what Kurt meant; this was the challenge.

His phone was ready and he got a feel of the piano keys beneath his fingers, felt along the old ivory and let the feeling of peace wash over him before he started playing.

Just as he feared the keys sound resonated through the park, so that anyone in the vicinity would hear the notes clearly. No one seemed to appear in the park and he was apparently left to start singing. He pressed 'record' and sang: no introduction, just words and music, a live performance for anyone watching his blog.

_Honey, it's been a long time coming_

_And I can't stop now_

_Such a long time running_

_And I can't stop now_

_Do you hear my heart beating?_

_Can you hear that sound?_

_Cause I can't help thinking_

_And I don't look down_

Blaine didn't realize that Kurt had pressed play almost as soon as he had started. He watched live and was mesmerized. Blaine didn't look at the screen; the only part visible to Kurt and the rest of Blaine's online world was the profile of his face and the swirl of blue and purple on the piano.

_And then I looked up at the sun_

_And I could see_

_Oh the way that gravity turns for you and me_

The sun had set but Blaine looked up at the sky and briefly closed his eyes, his smile showing just how free and peaceful he really was. Kurt strangely felt tears prickle at his eyes. Blaine was beautiful.

_And then I looked up at the sky and saw the sun_

_And the way that gravity pulls on everyone, on everyone_

_Baby, it's been a long time waiting_

_Such a long, long time_

_And I can't stop smiling_

_No I can't stop now_

_And do you hear my heart beating?_

_Ah can you hear that sound?_

_Cause I can't help crying_

_And I won't look down_

Kurt knew that Blaine was now the best version of himself, just like he had wished and he smiled knowing that even in some small way he had helped him with that.

_And then I looked up at the sun and I could see_

_Oh the way that gravity turns on you and me_

_And then I looked up at the sun and saw the sky_

_And the way that gravity pulls on you and I, on you and I_

_Can you hear my heart beating?_

_Can you hear that sound?_

_Cause I can't help crying_

_And I wont look down_

The singing finished but Blaine let his fingers continue on the keys as if he could barely take them away. He didn't notice the few people near a tree that had paused in their evening walk to listen to Blaine, to hear him play. He looked like he belonged there but eventually they dispersed after sharing smiles and went on their way.

After a while Blaine realised he was still recording and he pressed 'stop' and decided to start walking home. Kurt soon rang.

"Kurt?"

"Blaine that was fantastic," Kurt breathed into the phone.

"You saw it all?" Blaine asked incredulously.

"Yeah just now," Kurt said, "You didn't introduce yourself but you didn't have to. Did anyone see?"

"I don't actually know," Blaine said looking around at the trees and the entwined paths. No one was around now.

"It doesn't matter, you were perfect and everyone will be able to see that online too."

"I just love that song," Blaine said, "I had it on repeat last night and I guess it sums me up quite a bit."

"Gravity?"

"Yeah how everything just continues around us, even if we're not aware of it. It doesn't matter what we do, life goes on and we can choose to join the show or we can sit back and watch other people. I want to be a performer in life, Kurt. I think that song taught me that at least."

Kurt didn't know what to say. In some ways he was jealous that Blaine had realised that on his own, during the task but he couldn't feel bad. He was just insanely happy that Blaine was happy. He didn't want to ponder on how odd it was to feel that for someone he had never met in person.

"How did you know that piano would be there?" Blaine asked, breaking Kurt's reverie.

"I visited New York for nationals a few years ago and loved that there were pianos dotted all over the city. I had dreams of living there one day."

"What happened to those dreams?"

"I hope they've just been put on hold," Kurt said, "I really do want to live there someday."

"You will," Blaine said confidently.

"How do you know?"

"Because you knew that I could play in a public place, you knew I didn't need to introduce myself to be understood and to perform. You're magical Kurt, and magic has a way of finding magic."

"You really believe in me that much?" Kurt whispered, a little in shock.

"Of course," Blaine said the smile evident in his voice, "I've seen you perform 'Roar'."

Kurt laughed.

"That _was_ pretty awesome," he said, "I can't wait for my next challenge."

"Me too," Blaine said as he neared the subway. "I'd better go now, get on the train to go home. Speak to you later?"

"Definitely. Speak soon," Kurt said, "Bye Blaine. Thanks again."

"I'm not quite sure why you're thanking me, I should be thanking you, but I'll take it," Blaine said laughing, "Bye Kurt."

"Bye Blaine."

Kurt had the warmest feeling in his stomach as he padded to the kitchen to make his own dinner. He knew he wouldn't have long before it was Blaine's bed time – the time difference suddenly a nuisance – but he let his mind wander to big glasses and slightly curly hair and a soulful voice to match as he made pasta. He smiled to himself, pleased he had such a talented and amazing friend. It didn't matter that they had never met, Blaine already knew so much about him that he felt like he'd known him for years. He ignored the nagging feeling that Blaine had already made him feel things that not even friends like Rachel could induce. He just let the nice pleasant feeling wash over him as the pasta water bubbled and he smiled, remembering that gravity does indeed pull on you and me.

* * *

**Songs quoted**:

'Gravity' by Embrace

'Roar' by Katy Perry


	6. Chapter 6

Blaine was lying sideways on his bed with his laptop, like most evenings after class, chatting online to Kurt, who had just finished dinner. He had just come out of the shower, his blue monogrammed pyjamas almost clinging to his damp skin and his curls drying on top of his head. He rustled his hair comfortably as Kurt continued to message him about his day and what he had learnt. Blaine shared his photo of the day, a picture of a collection of benches, along one side of the park in black and white with an elderly couple who were wrapped so closely together they seemed to merge as one. The lady had a stick propped against the bench, her husband looking out to the world around them but nothing seemed to touch them, nothing bothered them as they sat there, against the world that was starting to leave them behind.

_That's perfection, I'd love to have that when I'm old and grey. Do you think we'll ever have that?_

_**You and me? Or you **__**and**__** me?**_

_Ha! You and me – in the future, with other people. _

_**I guess… I hope so. They seem so together that no one would be able to tell them apart. I want that.**_

_I think we're closer to that than we were twenty years ago or even five years ago. It's exciting to be this side of history, to watch it change. _

_Can I skype you? I've finished dinner now and I don't have any work on tonight._

_**Sure, just let me sort out my hair.**_

_Don't be ridiculous Blaine, I don't mind. I want to skype now._

_**Impatient much?! Okay, okay but no laughing when I show my curls…**_

Kurt's breath stilled in expectation and he watched his laptop's picture change to include the bedroom of someone nearly three thousand miles away. Blaine's brown honey eyes appeared on the screen, his face surrounded by curls, almost soft enough to imagine. Kurt gulped.

"You really didn't have to worry about that," Kurt said trying to laugh but finding he still needed to swallow. Blaine laughed.

"I know exactly what you think, I can almost see it on your face," he said.

"No, no," Kurt said clearly flustered and trying to school his expression to be neutral.

"Kurt, I'm joking," Blaine said laughing. "Did you want me to ring for a reason? What are you doing now?"

"Just lying in bed, all comfy," Kurt said snuggling lower in his bed to prove his point. "Have you got any work?"

"No not really," Blaine said, "Although I should probably rehearse for my dance mid-term. There's this one move that I've not quite mastered, I can't seem to let go. My dance tutor always prods me in the back as I dance, saying I need to loosen up a little, relax into the move but I get too tense. I don't really know how to dance."

"I'm sure that's not true," Kurt said, "But I always thought precision was important in dance. Maybe that's your gift?"

"Maybe," Blaine said wistfully, thinking of his dancing, wondering what his problem could be.

"Do you like to perform in front of others?" Kurt asked, "I always get nervous when I think of it but when I'm actually performing I imagine I'm somewhere else, like my kitchen or living room where I can be free or I even imagine I'm someone else. Like Patrick Swayze," Kurt said laughing, "He always had it, no matter what the dance move was."

"I always like to dance when I'm on my own, in fact I think I've got all the moves." Blaine winked at Kurt through the laptop and Kurt didn't want to admit what that did to his heart. He never knew it could swoop before.

"That's what you have to do," Kurt said, all the saliva seemingly disappearing from his mouth. "Just imagine you're on your own. Let loose and don't worry."

Blaine nodded, taking it all in, wondering how to improve the problem when Kurt suddenly got excited.

"I've got a great idea," he said, his face lighting up. "I'm not sure if I can pull it off but if I can it'll be perfect."

"What is it?" Blaine said, a little apprehensive.

"I'll let you know in a few days," Kurt said smiling and coming a little closer to the screen. Blaine suddenly thought that Kurt resembled a fox and he laughed nervously. What did Kurt have in store?

* * *

"How is that even possible?" Kurt exclaimed on the phone, "I thought you would have dismantled it by now; summer's over."

"It is," the guide said with a deep sadness, "But we've taken our time to take it down mainly because the weather was never in our favour. It takes such a large task force that we normally need at least two days of good weather."

"Please keep it up," Kurt begged, "Just for this week."

The guide seemed to ponder this for a moment.

"What's it worth?" he said sneakily and Kurt was a little outraged but willing to do anything.

"When I become famous, when I'm releasing my first album or singing on Broadway, I'll dedicate my performance to you, mention how you started my career. In fact," he said, struck with a sudden idea, "Remember the name Blaine Anderson because he'll do it first I'm sure."

The guide, who went by the name of Eric, had seen many people come to New York in the hope they would realise their dreams and succeed. Some had gone home, discovered their mistake and taken a different route but they all sounded the same: optimistic and full of beans. Kurt had explained his hopes for the future, told him what Blaine wanted to do too and he already felt he knew this kid a little. Kurt sounded a little different, more like the hope had been driven inside and he wasn't about to let it disappear again.

"Sure thing," Eric said chuckling, "Don't forget, mind."

"Yay!" Kurt shouted, "Thank you! Thank you! I won't forget I promise."

"Good," Eric said still smiling, "And I can only keep it up for a few days."

"Of course," Kurt said, "I'm sure Blaine won't let you down."

* * *

"That's my challenge?" Blaine said talking directly to Kurt on skype. He took a brief glance in the mirror in his dorm room, already noticing the colour had drained from his face slightly.

"It'll be perfect Blaine," Kurt said happily not really aware of the awkward shyness that seemed to permeate Blaine's very soul. "You said yourself how you can dance when no one is around, how you let yourself be free. This is your challenge. You have to sing, in fact I have the perfect song, and you can't let me down."

Put like that, Blaine didn't think he could let him down. The thought of fulfilling the task though, taking the challenge, was enough to make Blaine want to throw up his recently eaten dinner. One look at the hopeful glint in Kurt's eyes as he waited patiently for his answer and Blaine didn't realise it but he was nodding slowly, agreeing to this challenge, anything to create such a smile on Kurt's face again. It was bright and his eyes shone happily and Blaine found himself smiling too that he had caused that. The challenge couldn't be that harmful if it had led to such beauty. Blaine nodded again.

"If you're sure it will be ok?" Blaine asked.

"Of course Blaine," Kurt said, "I've had to promise you'll acknowledge him when you're famous." Blaine chuckled.

"Ok," he said.

"Have you got the moves?" Kurt asked with just a hint of laughter in his voice.

"I think so."

* * *

The stage was set. The park relatively quiet especially compared to the packed summer stage when thousands of people came to listen and see all kinds of performers and music. Blaine was looking forward to seeing some next summer as he had arrived too late in New York when he started the academic year. The stage looked a little pathetic now, bare and devoid of music and colour, no movement or rhythm.

"Are you Blaine Anderson?" a guy asked Blaine when he hovered near the side of the stage for a little too long.

"Yes," Blaine said in surprise.

"I was told you'd be along today," he said and he stretched out his hand for Blaine to shake. "I'm Eric and I can help you set up if you like."

"Really?" Blaine said incredulously.

"Yeah sure, you look like you could use a stiff drink," Eric said, "This friend of yours normally set such challenges?" He laughed as Blaine seemed to turn a paler shade.

"You spoke to Kurt?"

"Yeah, he organised it over the phone," Eric said, "He doesn't live here?"

"No, LA."

"Wow," Eric said, clearly impressed, "But you're students?" Blaine nodded. "I could have sworn he sounded like he was living in New York."

Eric led the way, showing Blaine how to connect the basic sound system. Any band or performer would need to have brought along their own but Blaine had the cheapest he could borrow at such short notice and no props. As he stood out at the park beneath him, the stage bare and lonely, Eric patted him on the shoulder.

"Do what you got to do then kid," he said, preparing to leave the stage.

"Wait," Blaine exclaimed and Eric turned. "Would you video it? For my friend, to prove I did it."

Eric laughed. "Where did you meet this kid?" Blaine thought it would be quite a long story and smiled to himself at the strangeness of the universe. Blaine handed him his phone, showed him how to work the gadget and Eric walked off the stage watching Blaine get ready. He took a deep breath, waited for the music to start and he moved. He started slow, just a shoulder, then a hip, barely lifting his head until he started to sing.

_Having trouble telling how I feel_

_But I can dance, dance, dance_

_Couldn't possibly tell you how I mean_

_But I can dance, dance, dance_

_So when I trip on my feet_

_Look at the beat_

_The words are written in the sand_

_When I'm shaking my hips_

_Look for the swing_

_The words are written in the air_

As if to prove the song was true, Blaine started to move more steadily to the beat, his hips showing how his confidence was growing. He smiled as he looked at the video phone and Eric, who was no longer the only audience member.

_Oh dance_

_I was a dancer all along_

_Dance, dance, dance_

_Words can never make up for what you do_

People started to creep onto the grass, closer to the stage to find out what this crazy kid was doing on his own.

_Easy conversations,_

_There's no such thing_

_No, I'm shy, shy, shy_

_My hips they lie_

_'Cause in reality, aye_

_I'm shy shy shy_

_When I trip on my feet_

_Look at the ground_

_The words are written in the dust_

_When I'm shaking my hips_

_Look for the swing_

_The words are written in the air_

_Oh dance_

_I was a dancer all along_

_Dance, dance, dance_

_Words can never make up for what you do_

The brass instruments started playing and Blaine spun around, closed his eyes, like there was no one there. He twitched his hips, even allowed a little twerking and the small crowd that had gathered started to laugh. Eric was the loudest and Blaine took one look at him and smiled, carrying the rhythm, allowing himself to be taken over by the music. It was in his nature to dance and it didn't matter that he would be videoed and people might think he was silly. He looked up to the sky and smiled, thinking that Kurt had brought him this and he was thankful.

The song finished and instead of looking pathetic as the song ended, his arms resting limply by his side, there was rapturous applause and Eric switched off the video so he could jump up and yell: 'Hell yeah!' Blaine started to walk off the stage but Eric shouted again.

"Shake that tush, shake it baby!" Blaine laughed and did as instructed, the crowd loving it even more. He hopped off stage, taking his phone as soon as he met Eric again.

"Dude that was way too cool for words," he said, incredulity on his face, "I can't believe you had the courage to do that."

"Neither do I," Blaine said laughing again, trying to catch his breath, "Kurt really is crazy."

"Crazy," Eric repeated, nodding in agreement, "But a crazy genius! Don't let go of that one."

Blaine stopped in his tracks slightly but then Eric noticed and Blaine soon carried on walking. He could never know what his words meant but Eric made Blaine think in a way he never had before. It didn't matter that Kurt was thousands of miles away, it didn't matter that they hadn't officially met, Kurt already knew his worries and fears, knew how to challenge him to make the most of himself and his future. He was the best friend Blaine could ever have asked for and he couldn't help but wonder if there was just a little something more sneaking in unannounced.

"I don't intend to," Blaine said nodding pensively and walking to the entrance of the park with Eric who kept chuckling to himself at what he had just witnessed. A few people patted Blaine on the shoulder as he walked, recognizing him from his performance but Blaine was lost in a world of blue sparkling eyes full of challenge and acceptance and a smile that made his stomach swirl.

* * *

**A/N**: The stage Blaine performs on is for the SummerStage and I'm not sure if they take it down or not so excuse the mistake if it's inaccurate.

**Song quoted**:

'Dance, Dance, Dance' by Lykke Li


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N:** I use the original gif prompt from Sara Rye in this chapter, which I will repost on my tumblr (willfuldreamer) as well as pictures and songs used.

* * *

Blaine noticed the season change as his photographs changed. Gone were the days where he could capture golden orange leaves and girls wearing light scarves, instead he needed a blanket to wrap around himself whilst he messaged Kurt and a thicker scarf around his own neck when he ventured outside. He'd received a formal email from his father enquiring what he was planning to do over the Christmas break and although he knew he would be welcomed into their house again he didn't fancy the impeccable dinner and the inane chatter about 'what he was getting up to' in New York. It was an unspoken rule that Blaine never mention anything that would be considered even remotely 'gay' and he was getting increasingly worried that, as he didn't know what that consisted of, he would accidently mention something that would offend them. It was easier to have Christmas in his dorm, on his own as Brad was obviously returning home, and wander around New York at this magical time of the year. He didn't think anything of mentioning it to Kurt, so accepting of his decision to spend Christmas alone, that he was actually surprised when Kurt seemed so horrified.

"Blaine you can't spend Christmas alone!" he screeched while they were talking on skype.

"Why not?" Blaine asked, shrugging his shoulders.

"Because no one should be alone during the holidays."

"I could always go home but I don't really want to," Blaine said, not getting the big deal. "The thought of forced conversation and escaping to my bedroom as soon as present opening and Christmas dinner are over, makes me want to yawn. I did all of that with Thanksgiving."

"But you'll miss the magic," Kurt said quietly. Blaine smiled. Kurt looked like such a lost child, Blaine was instantly reminded of his favourite childhood book, 'Peter Pan'.

"All the world is made of faith, and trust, and pixie dust," Blaine whispered and Kurt looked up in surprise.

"You like 'Peter Pan'?"

Blaine laughed. "Of course I do, it's my favourite book," he exclaimed.

Kurt sat up a little straighter in bed as if it was the most important conversation.

"Favorite quote?" he asked. Blaine instantly reeled it off.

"Dreams do come true, if only we wish hard enough. You can have anything in life if you will sacrifice everything else for it."

Kurt beamed. "Mine too," he said.

"I think even when I was seven and reading that in my bedroom using my night light in case my parents told me off, I dreamt of escape. I knew that dreams were the way to go. If you have one goal, one dream to strive for, you can go far."

"Do your parents not approve of your dream?" Kurt asked.

Blaine shook his head sadly. "They think I'm just a dreamer and that I have no idea what the real world is like. They want me to have a sensible job."

"So the course you chose wasn't a popular choice?"

Blaine laughed ruefully. "You could say that," he said, "I guess I don't care but it makes family dinners awkward. They still try to change my mind, remind me that I can always change my major, can always seek a different direction. I'm a little tired of trying to persuade them."

"They think your age is the reason?"

"Oh yeah, like I don't know my own mind. Maybe they think I'll soon be beaten down by the world and rejection."

Blaine didn't like the idea of failure but knew it was a possibility. Doubt would creep in during those moments and he would often consider at least changing his minor in case things went pear-shaped.

"That's better than never trying," Kurt said simply. He had faced similar fears and he always came to the same conclusion. "I don't care if I fail, at least I won't regret the decisions I made."

"You reblogged that the other day," Blaine said, struggling to remember the exact wording, his face looking confused.

"You have not failed until you have quit trying," Kurt said smiling that he had quoted it word for word.

"Exactly," Blaine said smiling too.

"I get that you don't want to spend the day with your parents, Blaine," Kurt said, his tone now serious, "But you can't give up on your dreams and you definitely can't forget the magic of Christmas."

"Ok, I'll try," Blaine said.

"Not good enough," Kurt said with mock severity, "You up for a Christmas related challenge?" He looked mischievous and Blaine's chest swooped again. He briefly wanted to kiss that cheeky grin away but Kurt was still talking, saying something about texting him details and having to go so he could cook dinner. Blaine waved and said 'goodbye' and Kurt was gone before he could think anymore about the Christmas challenge.

* * *

It was a week later before Blaine received a text about the challenge, so he had started to forget. Kurt had spent the week filling him in about how he juggled his workload as well as working at a coffee shop and updating his fashion blog. He spoke about what he would do for the Christmas holidays without going on about it too much, in case he upset Blaine. But Blaine could tell he was excited. Kurt spoke of his favorite memories with his mother and how he had saved for months to get her a keepsake box that looked just like the one Kurt had seen online recently. He had reblogged it so that Blaine could see it and comment. It really was pretty and he said so. Blaine was now walking past all the decorations, admiring all the lights and already feeling pretty Christmassy when Kurt text him.

_If you're still free tomorrow night, go to __the arch in Washington Square Park with a boom box and several Christmas songs of your choice. Meet everyone there at 6.45 for a 7pm start._

_**And you're not going to tell me what this is?**_

_No, but you will be singing if you didn't pick up on that already?!_

_**I guessed that! **_

_Video it for me?_

_**Of course. And this challenge will make me feel Christmassy? I'm already in a pretty Christmassy place right now…**_

_Wow… now I'm jealous._

_**Don't be, I'm jealous that you have a wonderful family to go back home to, one that won't try to persuade you not to dream.**_

_Well take loads of pictures for me (a New Yorker despite the distance)._

_**Ok my friend**_

_My friend?!_

_**Well my best friend if that's not too weird?**_

_No, not weird._

_**We've never met… maybe that is weird.**_

_No, definitely not weird. You're my best friend too. _

_**Good. I'll let you know how tomorrow goes.**_

_Looking forward to it :) _

* * *

Blaine could tell this would be big as he got closer to the meeting place in Washington Square Park. It looked like hundreds were gathered there, wrapped securely against the chilly wind and all prepared with their boom boxes. Blaine came closer and asked someone what was happening. The guy looked quizzically at Blaine's own boom box and replied with a confused expression.

"Aren't you already prepared?"

"Oh yeah but a friend told me just to arrive with this, I don't know what's happening," Blaine said.

The guy chuckled. "Well I'm Ethan," he said holding his hand out for Blaine to shake.

"Blaine."

"This is the best thing about Christmas. We all meet here and play our track together, singing through New York. It's called Unsilent Night."

"Wow," Blaine finally said, taking a look around, "And everyone is here to sing?"

"Yep, to spread Christmas cheer," he said jovially, "You got the tracks?"

"Tracks?"

"Yeah you have to download one of four different tracks and we go round in groups."

"I only have Christmas songs," Blaine said a little worried but another guy that seemed to be in charge suddenly appeared next to Blaine.

"Did I hear you say you only have Christmas songs?"

"Yeah," Blaine said.

"Good, you can lead a new group and use your own tracks," the guy said, gesturing to someone else that appeared to be a leader. "Will, this guy's leading his own group." He pointed at Blaine's head and everyone turned to look at Blaine too. This was suddenly the group to belong to so a few came closer to him.

"But I was just told to turn up here," Blaine said, gesturing with his hands, knowing that this was going too far.

"Don't worry kid," the guy said, "You'll be fine. No one will be able to hear you sing over the boom box."

And he walked off, obviously to set up another group.

"I actually sing at college," Blaine said quietly to Ethan.

"That's great," Ethan said, "You'll be fine then."

The crowd were gathered together to explain how it all worked and Blaine took a few pictures. They would all go together but mainly travel in groups so they could share boom boxes. Blaine would lead a group, everyone singing along until they had reached their final destination.

"You ready?" Ethan asked.

Blaine nodded nervously and pressed the boom box when instructed to start. Groups started moving forward and singing started. Blaine sang all the classics, enjoying leading after a while, when all the nerves dissipated. He led them through the park with jolly songs, causing the group, as well as people that gathered to watch, to sing loudly and happily. Blaine knew Christmas cheer was indeed being spread.

It came to the end, when Blaine's fingers were hurting slightly from holding the boom box above his head and everyone's feet were sore. They neared Tompkins Square Park after almost an hour of caroling and Blaine realized he hadn't recorded any of the songs. He had taken several photos but he knew Kurt would need video evidence. As everyone was wishing each other Merry Christmas and hugging goodbye, Blaine stopped Ethan who was about to go his own way.

"Would you mind recording me for my friend?" Blaine's cheeks were already flushed through cold but a warm blush appeared nonetheless. Ethan smiled.

"Sure thing," he said happily, "For your friend?"

"Yeah he set this up. He lives in LA."

"Wow, where did you meet?" Ethan asked as he took Blaine's phone, trying to figure out how to use the video.

"Oh we haven't met," Blaine said, a little embarrassed, "We chat online."

"Oh right," Ethan said nodding, "I get it. This seems a lot to do for someone that you haven't met."

Blaine felt a little defensive. "Well he's like my best friend, he's important to me."

Ethan nodded. "I'm ready when you are."

Groups of people were slowly leaving the park so as Blaine sang, the video also displayed the hoards of people that had been singing previously.

_Have yourself a merry little Christmas,_

_Let your heart be light_

_From now on,_

_Our troubles will be out of sight_

A group behind Blaine had stopped to listen, watching, mesmerized at the slower version he was singing and how different it was to the loud volume of the carols sung previously. Blaine was staring straight at the phone, singing directly to Kurt and really wishing him the best of Christmases.

_Have yourself a merry little Christmas,_

_Make the Yule-tide gay._

Blaine winked mischievously at the phone and Ethan laughed.

_From now on,_

_Our troubles will be miles away._

_Here we are as in olden days,_

_Happy golden days of yore._

_Faithful friends who are dear to us_

_Gather near to us once more._

_Through the years_

_We all will be together,_

_If the Fates allow_

The image of spending Christmas with Kurt, hanging up their own decorations, cooking turkey, filled Blaine with a sudden longing but he kept it together as the song finished.

_Hang a shining star upon the highest bough._

_And have yourself a merry little Christmas now._

Blaine finished to rapturous applause and he smiled, coming closer to the phone.

"Merry Christmas, Kurt," he said.

Ethan finished recording and handed the phone back to Blaine who thanked him.

"This Kurt seems special," Ethan said as he prepared to leave.

"Oh I don't know," Blaine said, a little flummoxed by the comment, "I don't think he sees me like that."

"He set you a challenge like that, which took thought and organization?" Blaine nodded. "People don't do that for just anybody. I wouldn't be surprised if you ended up together."

Ethan patted him on the shoulder and wished him a merry Christmas but turning to go, Blaine stopped him.

"But he lives miles away," Blaine said.

"So?" Ethan said, "Love knows no distance."

And he was off, leaving Blaine in a more secluded park but never had he been as confused as he felt at that moment.

* * *

"That was amazing Blaine!" Kurt exclaimed on skype later on that night. "I can't believe they let you lead your own group. You're obviously talented and they saw that straight away."

"Well it's all because of you," Blaine said quietly, feeling a little overwhelmed. "You helped me become so much more confident Kurt, I can't begin to thank you."

"Don't be silly," Kurt said, changing his position so he was resting on his stomach on his bed. "You had it all along, otherwise you wouldn't have got into NYADA. I just helped it along."

"No Kurt," Blaine said, desperate to be understood and the compliment accepted. "It was you. You believed in me, knew what I needed to do to become a better version of myself. No one has ever done that for me before."

Kurt was silent, uncomfortable with accepting the comment but knowing that it was important to Blaine. He simply nodded.

"Feel more Christmassy now?" he said, changing the subject.

"Definitely, I'm actually looking forward to it now," Blaine said.

"Can I still ring on Christmas Day?" Kurt asked.

"You'll be busy with family Kurt, I don't want to intrude."

"Don't be silly," Kurt said, "It wouldn't be Christmas without you."

"Really?" Blaine asked, a little surprised that he meant that much to him.

"Blaine…" Kurt said, his annoyance creeping out. "It wouldn't be a normal day now without some form of communication with you, let alone on Christmas. You're really important to me, best friends, remember?"

"Best friends," Blaine said, nodding. "Right."

Blaine had found Ethan's comment replaying in his head as soon as Unsilent Night had finished. There was no doubt in Blaine's mind that Kurt was starting to mean so much more than just a best friend. Everything that came out of Kurt's pretty mouth had the capacity to make him smile or his heart soar. He was starting to worry about the constant fluctuation in his heartbeat lest it induce a heart attack. But as he looked to Kurt, who always seemed so carefree and happy, he started to fear that Kurt would never feel the same, that Blaine was making it bigger in his mind and they were just friends that met online. He hadn't realized he had been in his own little world until Kurt started speaking again and he knew he had missed a whole chunk of conversation.

"Do you think we'll ever meet," Kurt said, "You know, in real life?"

Blaine was so desperate for that but knew with their busy college schedules and the expense of travel that it wouldn't happen for a very long time.

"We will," Blaine said hopefully. "Someday I know we will."

"Hey, isn't it like three am over there right now?" Kurt asked looking at his own watch. "Shouldn't you be asleep?"

Blaine looked nervous, not able to look Kurt in the eye but he thought now was the moment, so he took his chance.

"I tried Kurt," he said, "But I couldn't stop thinking about you."

There was a pause and Kurt sucked in a breath.

"About me?"

Blaine nodded.

"What about me?" Kurt asked, his voice a mere whisper.

Blaine saw it all flash across his mind, the gentle way Kurt would let him down, the pretence that they were just friends would continue and Blaine would feel rejected but Kurt would move on. Blaine swallowed.

"Everything," Blaine breathed, "Just how important you are to me, what a great friend you are…"

Kurt smiled and Blaine thought he could see a brief glimpse of relief flood his face.

"You mean that much to me too Blaine," Kurt said and Blaine could see him swallow too. "I don't care that we've never met. You're more important to me than anyone."

Blaine nodded. He could accept that, as long as he had Kurt in his life. He suddenly remembered his own Christmas.

"Can I have your address?" Blaine asked, taking Kurt by surprise. "I wanted to post my gift to your dad's house so you'd get it for the day."

"Oh yes," Kurt said excitedly, "I have your gift too and need your address."

They swapped addresses and ended the conversation, leaving Blaine wondering if he had been forceful enough with his declaration but deciding that it was probably for the best. If Kurt just saw them as close friends Blaine didn't want to jeopardize that. He would have to be satisfied with that.

* * *

Blaine opened his gift from Kurt as soon as Christmas morning arrived. A few presents had been sent from family but Kurt's was opened first and as soon as he saw it and how well it fitted his personality as well as their challenges, he smiled and put it around his wrist. A metallic bracelet branded with the word 'courage' would remind him of everything that Kurt had given him over the last few weeks. He would never forget and it brought a tear to his eye that it was just such a perfect gift. Kurt rang him a lot quicker than he thought he would, but Blaine accepted the call quickly.

"Kurt, I've just opened the gift and it's perfect," Blaine beamed, brandishing the gift in front of him so Kurt could see him wear it.

"Oh you opened it," Kurt said happily, "Do you really like it?"

"Are you kidding Kurt? I love it!"

"Good," Kurt said smiling widely, "I haven't opened your present yet. Do you mind if I open it now?"  
"No of course not," Blaine said, though he looked a little worried. "I hope it's ok, you might think it's a little girly."

"Don't be silly," Kurt said, holding the wrapped gift. "I'm sure I'll love it."

He opened it carefully, already suspecting it was fragile. It took Kurt a while to realize what it was when it was finally revealed. The pretty heart-shaped keepsake box that looked just like the one he had bought his mother all those years ago.

"Kurt?"

"You remembered…" Kurt whispered as if he was talking to himself.

"Of course I remembered," Blaine said chuckling, "Does it still remind you of your mom?"

Kurt nodded and finally looked up at the laptop screen to show Blaine his tear-filled eyes.

"Oh Kurt," Blaine said, immediately wracked with guilt. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to upset you."

"You didn't," Kurt said shaking his head and smiling to prove it. "I can't believe you remembered."

"It was important to you," Blaine whispered.

"I love it," Kurt whispered and he had a sudden urge to say he loved _Blaine_ but he shook his head in amazement at the gift in front of him instead.

"Merry Christmas Blaine," he said and Blaine smiled even wider. He may be physically on his own this Christmas but he was never actually alone and this was the best way he could ever imagine spending the day.

* * *

Blaine would vow never to drink on his own again the following morning when he woke with a banging head. The eggnog that his mother had sent him had to be opened, he reasoned, and he only had a few, but it gave him the courage he thought he needed, to do what he had wanted to do all along.

He would occasionally look at the bracelet Kurt had given him, feel like he was on the crest of a wave and determined to be understood. He reasoned it wouldn't be that obvious, especially if he didn't message Kurt directly, he would just put it on his blog and maybe Kurt would never see it after all.

He set up his webcam above his rickety piano and pressed record, starting to play soon after.

_Wise men say only fools rush in_

_But I can't help falling in love with you_

_Shall I stay, would it be a sin?_

_I can't help falling in love with you_

_Like a river flows surely to the sea_

_Darling so it goes_

_Some things are meant to be_

_So take my hand and take my whole life too_

'_Cos I can't help falling in love with you_

_Like a river flows so surely to the sea_

_Oh my darling so it goes_

_Some things are meant to be._

_So won't you please just take my hand? _

_And take my whole life too. _

'_Cos I can't help falling in love, in love with you_

'_Cos I can't help falling in love, falling in love,_

_Falling in love with you. _

Blaine finished, letting the words hover in the air. He looked at the webcam for the first time and smiled sadly. He briefly thought Kurt would never know and it panicked him, the eggnog giving him courage he thought he would never have. Before he could change his mind, he looked directly at the webcam and said:

"This is for Kurt," he said, "Merry Christmas darling."

He switched off the webcam and sat in silence. He uploaded the video before he could convince himself of his mistake and waited in his room, his dorm now so small and isolating, he wanted to curl up in bed and cry. He could only imagine how Kurt would react if he ever saw it.

* * *

It took Kurt a few hours to see it, what with all the rush of Christmas dinner but when he had a few hours to himself after all the washing up, he went online to see if anyone had posted anything exciting.

He was surprised Blaine had uploaded a video especially as he hadn't been tagged, which had been their custom when they posted online. Kurt clicked the video and was mesmerised as Blaine sang such a sweet song so beautifully, tears forming easily by the end. He was reminded of how Blaine had sung when they first met online, just after Finn died; how Blaine had made him feel so in touch with everything, so connected. He was about to turn the video off as soon as Blaine stopped playing but Blaine's words rang out, loud and clear and he paused.

Had Blaine meant all those words for him? He instantly replayed the song and watched, everything now meaning so much more. Blaine looked slightly pained as he sang, something Kurt hadn't noticed before, as if he was unburdening himself finally. He switched it off as it stopped, turned off his computer and lay on his bed, saying nothing, not returning downstairs but left with a dilemma that plagued him as he drifted off to sleep. Honey coloured eyes, dark curls desperate to spring loose and a smile that always made Kurt swoon. Christmas had ended, a new year came closer and Kurt wondered what this now meant for his future.

* * *

**Songs quoted**:

'Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas'

'Can't Help Falling In Love With You' originally by Elvis but I prefer the version by Ingrid Michaelson


	8. Chapter 8

The first thing Blaine noticed was the taste of carpet as he tried to swallow. He woke up groggy, feeling blindly for his bedside lamp, which he managed to knock over before he sat up slowly, the blood reaching his head in stages. He was suddenly aware of his pounding head and he clutched it painfully.

"Oh fuck," he moaned to nobody, "What did I drink last night?"

The half drunk tumbler of eggnog seemed to mock him as it rested on the side. He'd only had one or two, how did that equate to a banging headache and the taste of fur? He stumbled to the bathroom to inspect the damage a little closer in the mirror but it was only when he stubbed his toe on his old piano that the memory of his song came flooding back. He groaned and closed his eyes, feeling too weak to make it to the bathroom. He sat back on the bed, holding his painful head in his hands.

"What have I done?" he muttered to himself.

* * *

It was only as he woke the day after Christmas day, the pretty keepsake box on his bedside table and the memory of the song playing in his mind, that Kurt thought perhaps he had misread it all. Blaine was a good friend, the very best, but perhaps the loneliness of the day spent mainly on his own, Christmas in a cold city, so big and vast, meant that he had sung that song and directed it to Kurt out of misplaced affection. Maybe Kurt had taken it wrongly, misinterpreting his need for companionship and taking it too far. He would ring Blaine a little later to find out.

But as the day wore on and he helped Carole with another meal for visiting family his mind kept returning to Blaine and his song on the piano. The song was one of his favourite all-time songs and Blaine knew that, knew it reminded him of his mom who would hum it in the kitchen as she baked cupcakes. He was sure he had told Blaine that many weeks ago, maybe he was just singing to go with his Christmas present? But as he cooked and baked, stirring mechanically, his mind wandered to those earnest brown green eyes that often made Kurt melt and that laugh that Kurt thought just might be the best sound ever invented. He stopped stirring, his hand stuck in the tough mixture.

"You ok sweetie?" Carole asked as she was chopping vegetables from the other side of the kitchen. Kurt started.

"Oh yeah,"" he said, stirring again and his eyes returning to the task in hand.

"Anything on your mind?" Carole persisted, "You look like you've stirred that mixture quite enough."

Kurt looked down at the dough accusingly, as if it had let him down. He sighed.

"Just a little dilemma," he said. He looked at Carole's kind face and sighed again. "I have a friend…" he began and Carole nodded, knowing exactly who he meant. "Who met another friend online but the lines are all blurred for them now and they live so far apart but they're as close as you can be when you know each other online. Now it's a little complicated and I don't know…" Kurt hesitated. "I don't know what to suggest to my friend," he finished. Carole nodded again, taking the information in and looking carefully at the door in case Burt walked in.

"I think first off, you should tell your friend to be careful of online friendships," she said, "You don't really know anyone that you meet online, they could be pretending to be anybody."

"Oh I trust Blaine," Kurt said quickly without thinking then closed his mouth abruptly when he realised. Carole smiled.

"It's fine honey," she said coming closer so she could whisper, "I think it's great that you're making friends even if it is online. Just be careful."

"He's great," Kurt rushed out, "I mean we text, chat on skype and online and I just _know_ I can trust him."

Carole smiled as he gushed.

"He bought me a keepsake box that I told him reminded me of my mom and he remembers all our conversations, like I really matter to him," he said then he took a seat at the kitchen counter, looking a little sunken. "But he sang me a song yesterday, for Christmas, a love song," he hesitated, looking up at Carole who tried not to react though he said it slowly. "And I don't know what to think."

"Do you feel the same?"

Kurt thought about it, didn't think it wise to admit so much but thoughts of Blaine had been playing along the empty stage of his mind for a few weeks now and he looked up sheepishly. Carole smiled.

"I think I might do."

Carole clasped her hands together but refrained from squealing. Kurt blushed.

"Then you need to meet I think," she said calmly, "Maybe with other people, so there's less pressure. Maybe test out the waters a little?"

He thought it over and nodded. Meeting Blaine would be scary and a little strange. He had a certain image of Blaine, one that really only showed him from his shoulders upwards and he wasn't sure what would happen when they met.

"Think about it honey," she said rubbing his arm kindly and leaving him to chop the vegetables once more. That was all Kurt _could_ do.

* * *

The silence was driving Blaine a little crazy. He had started blogging online, speaking to other people he knew, keeping his posts light and cheerful all to highlight that he was around and open to talk if Kurt wasn't busy. There wasn't a day now where they didn't communicate in some way and Blaine knew what the silence meant: Kurt was thinking or avoiding him. Blaine realised he _had_ to get out of the dorm.

He took several photos while he was in Central Park, instantly posting them on instagram, which linked to his other sites. Haunting black and white photos where the light shone brightly, so bright in fact it seemed to pierce his eyes through the camera. He never noticed Kurt's comments as he walked the park, desperately trying to take the perfect shot, finding images slipping away, his finger never quite quick enough. His heart beat faster and he walked quicker, bending every so often to take unusual shots. Eventually he noticed a beep and it popped up on his phone that he had several comments on his instagram account.

_Fantastic shot, wish I was there. _

_The lights are amazing Blaine, really piercing. _

_It looks cold there, is it cold?_

Blaine could read between the lines, Kurt was reaching out, even seemed nervous despite the distance between them and the beauty of online friendships. He was starting to ramble. Blaine replied in his comments box.

_**It is cold, I'm still in the park. **_

_Are you ok?_

_**I needed to get out of my dorm, needed the chill and the lights in the darkness.**_

_That sounds like a metaphor._

_**I think it might be.**_

Blaine kept walking for a while, no longer taking photos, the impetus gone and he felt a little tired. It had been a surprisingly long day despite the worry and the loneliness.

_Can I ring later?_

Blaine let the comment stare blankly at him for a while as he contemplated complaining of a headache or putting him off for a while but he replied, knowing that Kurt was trying his best.

_**Sure, I'll be home soon. **_

Blaine left it like that, just a casual comment between friends but his stomach started to twist in knots as he walked home quickly. The chill in the air was no longer pleasant and he only wanted to bury his head under the covers so he could forget. Kurt was sure to let him down gently, may even pretend he hadn't seen the video and continue on as before, letting Blaine slowly die inside.

As he entered his dorm, prepared his laptop for a skype call, an event that often made his day, he soon felt the dread settle into his stomach and stay there. He pressed call.

"Blaine?"

It was a useless question, Blaine's face appearing in front of him, Kurt knew it was him but the situation seemed to call for trepidation. Kurt clutched his hands in his lap, out of sight and tried a warm smile.

"How was your Christmas?" Blaine asked, cutting right to a point in the conversation that would be comfortable. Kurt looked taken aback.

"Oh yeah it was great thanks," he said happily, "We had family over today so I was a little busy earlier. What have you done today?"

"Just walking around the park," Blaine said, looking slightly embarrassed. "I was a little unwell earlier, think I drank a little too much of the eggnog my mom bought me."

Kurt chuckled a little, feeling uneasy, Blaine hung his head.

"I know I've always been a bit of a lightweight but even for me that's embarrassing," he said, "And drinking on my own." He shook his head at his own behaviour.

Kurt looked like he didn't know what to say. Christmas should never be spent alone and yet he had allowed Blaine to wallow. He started to speak at the same time Blaine did.

"Blaine, I shouldn't…"

"Never mind, I know it's bad…"

"Sorry you speak first," Kurt said but Blaine indicated he should continue.

"I just feel bad that I allowed you to spend it on your own. Christmas I mean," he stuttered, "No one should be on their own."

Blaine shrugged out of embarrassment. He looked so lost and confused, Kurt immediately opened his mouth and wanted to close it straight after he let the impassioned words spill out.

"You should visit me."

As soon as the words came out of Kurt's mouth, Blaine's jaw went slack.

"You'd want to meet me?" Blaine asked.

Kurt looked instantly sad that Blaine had asked such a lowly question.

"Of course I want to meet you," Kurt said passionately, coming forward in his seat so Blaine saw a close up of Kurt's piercing blue eyes. "Would you be able to afford it?"

"Oh yeah," Blaine said instantly, "My allowance would cover that, I don't spend a lot anyway."

Kurt smiled.

"And of course I'd love to," Blaine said smiling wide, "Meet you, I mean."

"Great, when do you think you'd be able to come out here? I know you can't miss classes but maybe for a weekend?"

Blaine thought it over. "Two weeks time? I can get things together and make sure I don't have too much work on."

"Great and you can stay with me and Rachel if you like."

"Oh I don't want to intrude," Blaine said, now slightly flustered. "I mean we've never met and I could be anyone. I could be deranged."

Kurt laughed. "I doubt you're deranged Blaine. I feel like I've known you for years though, is that strange?"

Blaine's expression softened and he nodded, panic slightly over.

"Yeah I feel that way too," he said, "But I wouldn't want you to feel awkward. I can stay in a hotel."

"Ok," Kurt said seeing the sense, "I'm really looking forward to meeting you Blaine."

"Me too. I'll make all the arrangements and let you know."

Kurt nodded and after a while he was about to sign off when he whispered something.

"It was a lovely song you sang last night, Blaine."

His voice was so soft, Blaine almost was tempted to ask him to repeat it but before he could even respond Kurt just smiled, small and sweet, a blush on his cheeks and he said 'goodbye' and was gone.


	9. Chapter 9

For the next two weeks their conversations always started with 'when we meet' or 'when you're here' with smiles and excited bopping in seats. On his return to AMDA, Rachel had raised a pointed eyebrow in Kurt's direction when she had been told about Blaine's impending visit but it was Santana who was all for it.

"That's great lady lips," she smirked, as she paraded around the apartment as if auditioning for the catwalk. "I'm all for catching people online because you can't meet them in real life. Desperate people have got to use desperate means."

"Hey, I'm not desperate!" Kurt exclaimed angrily and after a moments pause he realised her full sentiment. "And I'm not trying to 'catch' Blaine, we're not dating."

"But you will be," Santana said matter-of-factly, "We all know that's how it's done."

"Oh stop it!" Kurt said angrily, "Blaine and I are just friends and do not intend to 'hook up'," he air-quoted.

Santana nodded wisely as if she knew the truth.

"But you like him?" Rachel whispered near Kurt's ear on the sofa. Kurt looked at Rachel, lowered on the sofa, zipped up in a onesie with her hair pulled away from her face, and he paused a little longer.

"I think so," he admitted with a blush. "I like him, he's pretty cute with his curly hair and oversized glasses and he's a great friend but I don't know what it'll be like when we meet. I don't _really_ know him. Maybe I just think I do."

"Well it sounds like a good idea to meet him now then."

"Yeah," Kurt said, "I just don't know what's going to happen when I do."

* * *

"When we meet you have just got to come to Disneyland," Kurt enthused, bopping in his seat at his laptop. Blaine's eyes widened in excitement.

"Yes!" he said bopping too, "That has to happen!"

"And Griffith Park," Kurt continued, his eyes wandering quickly, giving the impression he was thinking and conjuring images in his mind. Blaine smiled.

Kurt's eyes finally landed on Blaine's expression.

"You think I'm silly?" Kurt said as if it was final. "You think I'm planning too much for your first visit?"

"No," Blaine said, his expression softening, his head shaking, "But I just worry that it'll disappoint. We might not have time."

Kurt nodded slowly accepting the sentiment and realising his mistake.

"I'm just really looking forward to you visiting Blaine," Kurt said quietly, knowing that the sentence uttered meant so much more. Blaine's eyes seemed to turn a golden brown and he smiled, a twinkle appearing as he took it all in.

"I can't wait either," Blaine said. "But it doesn't matter what we do or where we go. I get to _meet_ you, that's enough."

At the thought, there was such an unadulterated look of expectation and amazement on Blaine's face that Kurt felt tears appear in his eyes, though he smiled brightly.

"Then I won't plan anything more," Kurt said, still beaming, almost feeling bigger sitting opposite Blaine on the laptop screen. "I can't wait."

* * *

Kurt was true to his word, he didn't plan a thing, but the time came to meet Blaine at the airport, the shiny floor causing Kurt to sweep his foot in circular movements repeatedly with ease. Kurt thought he should have planned for _this_. This feeling of nervous energy coursing through his veins, causing him to pick at the delicate skin of the tips of his fingers until they were red and sore. His lip caught beneath his teeth, his eyes darting to gaze on every single person that came through the terminal. He had considered having a placard to announce his presence, declaring he was waiting for someone named Blaine but he had thought it all too much. Surely Blaine would recognise him, would remember what he looked like from so many skype calls. When Kurt realised he was rising and falling on the balls of his feet, he stopped still and tried to wait patiently.

Blaine came eventually, his overnight luggage trailing behind him, his own eyes darting, scanning for Kurt, the Kurt he had only seen through a laptop. He looked tired but so excited and as if his own skin was buzzing at the thought of seeing Kurt, that Kurt could only shout and wave when he appeared amidst the crowd.

"Blaine!"

Blaine's eyes landed on Kurt and he rushed forward, his feet going ahead of his brain so when he stopped in front of the guy he was slowly calling his best friend, he was unsure what to do. Kurt went forward as if to hug him but at the last minute he seemed to think better of it and his arms hang limply at his side. If Blaine was disappointed he didn't show it; it took only a moment of hesitation before he decided to hug Kurt anyway.

Kurt breathed out quickly with the hug, Blaine squeezing him in his eagerness. Blaine's face was alight with such happiness at seeing his best friend for the first time that Kurt beamed in return.

"You're here," Kurt whispered, a little dazed. Blaine nodded. "Was your flight good?"

"Not too bad," Blaine said, still smiling. Even the reminder that he had sat between two larger men on the plane and didn't have a window seat like he hoped, couldn't dampen his mood.

"Do you want to grab something to eat? Maybe on the way to your hotel?" Kurt asked, nervous butterflies finally settling in his stomach. Blaine wasn't all that different to the guy he had gotten to know on the laptop, thousands of miles away. It was strange to think he was here, flesh and blood, and Kurt touched him carefully, brushing his arm in case he was going to vanish. Blaine noticed but it only caused his smile to grow bigger.

"That sounds like a plan, Batman," Blaine said laughing and Kurt joined in, his musical laughter ringing out. They started walking to get out of the busy airport.

"It's so great to see you," Blaine said, as they walked. "It's strange isn't it, you look so different in front of me but I know you're just the same."

Blaine started sharing stories of his travelling, the time he had off over the break and they soon came across a nice coffee shop when they got nearer to Kurt's accommodation.

"Find us a table, I'll get these," Blaine said as he walked with a bounce to the counter. Kurt was surprised but he took Blaine's luggage and settled nearby on a comfy sofa chair. Blaine soon walked over with a tray of coffees and cookies; it rocked slightly as he placed it on the table between them.

"Mocha, right?" Blaine asked and Kurt's mouth opened slightly.

"You remembered?"

"Yeah," Blaine said shrugging and taking his seat, "You mentioned it once on the phone when you were wandering home after a class. I didn't know what cookies you might like so I got a selection."

Kurt shook his head slightly but Blaine just looked confused.

"What did you want to do while you were here?" Kurt asked after a while, conversation once again flowing easily between them. "I was good and didn't plan anything like you said."

"I know this isn't very exciting but I'd kind of like to take some photos," Blaine said, his shoulders sinking slightly under the suggestion. "Find some strange places, listen to all the stories of the city and take shots that capture something. Is that ok?"

"Oh yeah, that sounds great. I don't think I'd be very good at spotting places so you might have to suggest a few, help me take photos. You have an eye for that, I just see people, you recognise the story."

"I just wonder what makes people tick," Blaine said shrugging his shoulders at the compliment. "I look at them when they're thinking or struggling and can't help but wonder what goes through their head. New York is a great place for capturing moments. I love it there."

"I'm so jealous," Kurt said sadly, "I wish I was there."

"You should visit me," Blaine said eagerly. "I mean I can't offer you accommodation but you should still come. See what you're missing."

"We went there for nationals in my junior year of high school and I had such plans but they never happened. It seems so far away now."

"It doesn't have to be," Blaine said, "Life is what you make it. Just because you're in LA now doesn't mean you'll always be there. Someone once told me it's so very important to dream and strive for what you really want in life."

Kurt smiled. He had remembered.

"I have the perfect place to go tomorrow," Kurt said his mind full of pictures, his eyes filled with excitement.

"Can't wait."

* * *

Kurt took Blaine to meet Santana and Rachel before he took him to his hotel. The girls were both subdued, observing Blaine to find out what he was all about. Santana looked him over carefully, determined to find something that was 'off' or wrong, something to criticise but even his outfit and nerdy glasses seemed to suit Blaine. She thought of a great cutting comment but one glance at his innocent expression, full of wonder at finally meeting Kurt and his friends and she couldn't say it. It died on her lips and although she protested, started to complain about all the singing, she soon joined in on their sing along as they all watched Mamma Mia.

As it got later, Kurt took Blaine to his hotel, helped him check in and got back to his room hours later.

"He's lovely," Rachel gushed as soon as he entered. "And his voice… that voice sounds like honey. You have got to start practicing and planning for duets with him." Kurt rolled his eyes. Next she'll be planning his wedding.

"Just let the guy visit first."

"No but Kurt he's a keeper, you can just tell."

Kurt looked to Santana for advice but she stayed mute and cocked an eyebrow. If even Santana seemed to approve, could find nothing wrong with him, Kurt was completely done for.

* * *

_Is it funny I still need to text you, though I saw you only a couple of hours ago?_

_**No, I was just about to text too. My day isn't complete without a goodnight text! Thanks for today Kurt. It was perfect :)**_

Kurt looked at the smiley face, took a second to decide then typed his own reply on his phone.

_It was perfect… looking forward to tomorrow and finally seeing LA though I've lived here for months now. Good night Blaine x_

Kurt held his breath, waited for a beep and watched the clock face on his phone indicate a minute had passed.

_**Looking forward to tomorrow too! Sweet dreams Kurt x**_

* * *

They took to hiking the following day, determined to see the sights from great heights. Blaine came ready with his camera, constantly clicking but as the sun started to set and the boys had chatted for hours, they saw sights that seemed to echo The Lion King's opening scene. Blaine goofed around, sang the African sounds, making Kurt fall about laughing. Blaine clicked again.

"You took a photo of me laughing?" Kurt said, stopping short. Blaine worried his bottom lip, nodding, was Kurt offended?  
Kurt suddenly sprang to life, gripped the camera and took it from Blaine's hands and started madly clicking to capture Blaine's face. It was comical how struck he was and Kurt took so many shots of surprise, Blaine's mouth ajar, his eyes wide. Blaine started to laugh, the light lines around his eyes, his mirth showing and highlighting how truly gorgeous Kurt thought he was, as the camera continued to click until eventually Kurt handed it back.

"They'll look fantastic," Kurt said without thinking and Blaine could only blush at the sincere praise. He turned to face the hill in front of them, the sun setting behind it so it glowed a shade of orange. A group of men were standing on top so they were silhouetted, their hats shapes noticeable.

"It's awesome here," Blaine said smiling at the shot he had just taken.

"I wish I could spot those shots, see the beauty in things like you do," Kurt said quietly. Blaine faced him, wondering at the comment and then noticing the drop beneath them. He crept closer and looked down, causing Kurt to panic slightly as he stayed safely where he could just see skyline. Blaine suddenly started to sing.

_Hope when you take that jump_

_You don't fear the fall_

_Hope when the water rises_

_You build a wall_

_Hope when the crowd screams out_

_They're screaming your name_

_Hope if everybody runs_

_You choose to stay_

Blaine turned, his eyes shining with exploration and wonder at the world he had stumbled upon and most of all the person he was with, after all these months of talking and seeing only a computer screen.

_Hope that you fall in love_

_And it hurts so bad_

Blaine smiled as if saying a secret and knowing Kurt's answer.

_The only way you can know_

_Is give it all you have_

_And I hope that you don't suffer_

_But take the pain_

_Hope when the moment comes_

_You'll say..._

Blaine suddenly grabbed Kurt's hand and forced him to come closer, nearer the drop and watching the scene that unfolded below, untouched and perfect.

_I, I did it all_

_I, I did it all_

_I owned every second_

_That this world could give_

_I saw so many places_

_The things that I did_

_Yeah, with every broken bone_

_I swear I lived_

Kurt's laughter rang out and then as Blaine paused he sang out too, his voice alone, Blaine watching as Kurt looked out at the sight below.

_Hope that you spend your days_

_But they all add up_

_And when that sun goes down_

_Hope you raise your cup_

_I wish that I could witness_

_All your joy and all your pain_

_But until my moment comes_

_I'll say..._

And they sang together, Kurt really feeling like he could do it all. He'd felt a little stilted in LA recently, trapped in a place that he didn't really belong but with Blaine he could feel a little more alive again. With Blaine it was a better place after all.

_I, I did it all_

_I, I did it all_

_I owned every second_

_That this world could give_

_I saw so many places_

_The things that I did_

_Yeah, with every broken bone_

_I swear I lived_

"Tomorrow's going to be a great day," Blaine said smiling and Kurt believed him.

* * *

**Song quoted**:

'I Lived' by One Republic


	10. Chapter 10

Kurt met Blaine outside his hotel the next morning with warm muffins and coffee, the smell hitting Blaine's nostrils nearly as soon as the image of Kurt in a scarf and light jacket.

"I don't think I'll ever get used to the weather change here," Blaine said shaking his head and giving Kurt a hug in greeting.

"I don't think I'll ever get used to hugging you," Kurt said, laughing as they parted. Blaine's face fell slightly though he breathed in the coffee and a smile appeared again as it was handed to him. "I mean I'm so used to seeing you on a computer screen and only two-dimensional that it still feels odd to touch you now."

"You don't do hugs?"

"No, not really. I hug my dad and I used to hug Finn but no one else really. I guess I hug when someone's upset but I don't generally like it."  
"Oh well I guess I'm the same really," Blaine said, thinking it through. "I only hug people I'm close to though I don't hug my parents and I don't really remember hugging anyone at high school." Blaine looked confused and he hadn't realised he'd stopped on the sidewalk. "Actually, I only really hug you." He looked directly at Kurt. "Is that odd?"  
"No, no of course not," Kurt said hurriedly though inside his stomach was twirling. _Blaine only hugged him!_

"It feels natural with you, even though we've only just met."

"I get it Blaine, but really we've known each other a lot longer."

"Yeah, exactly," Blaine said nodding happily. "So what should we do today?"

"I thought we'd visit a beach," Kurt said, "Get the full California experience. I know it's an hour drive but Malibu beaches are fantastic and great photo opportunities."

"Sounds amazing," Blaine said excitedly, "Do you need help driving?"  
"No it's ok, as I know where I'm going, but that also means I get to choose the music."

"Ah jeez whizz," Blaine said, looping his arm in front of him as if it was a hardship. Kurt laughed.

"I don't know if we share the _exact_ same taste in music," Kurt said warningly.

"I'm sure we'll find out."  
x

Kurt's driving playlist consisted of show tunes that would have Santana complaining loudly or songs that were just made for long open roads when the sun was shining. There didn't seem to be a song they disagreed on and Blaine, showing he knew them well, sang most of them loudly.

"I've missed this," Blaine said after Pink's 'Perfect' had been sung. "I don't get to sing in my dorm really, Brad would think I'd gone mad."

"You don't get to sing?"  
"Well at NYADA of course and in the shower," Blaine smirked but he would have no idea the image that came unbidden to Kurt's mind. Water cascading down a lightly tanned chest, curls wet and dripping. Kurt swallowed loudly.

"Do you like to sing outside of AMDA?"  
"I don't get loads of opportunities but living with Rachel has to include singing around our apartment and we go to bars every so often, AMDA hangouts where we sing. I guess once it's in your blood you have to sing."

"I don't think I have that in New York, I don't know enough people, I don't go out enough. It would definitely be improved if you came to visit." Blaine laughed but Kurt's face fell.

"I'd love to but I don't think I could afford it until Spring Break."  
"But that's fantastic!" Blaine exclaimed, "You could visit for the whole of Spring Break."  
"You won't be going home?"

"No," Blaine shook his head; "I pay for my dorm all year round so I may as well get my money's worth. I don't know if I'd be terribly welcome at home either."

"That's horrible."

"I offended them by not spending Christmas with them though I thought it would be easier. It looks bad to other people though and it's very important that they at least play the part of loving parents."

"What's it like when you're there?"  
"We go out for fancy meals, they ask what New York is like and what I've been doing to further my career. They don't acknowledge that I'm gay but they do accept that I want to be a professional singer, perhaps on Broadway. They just think I should already be making strides to get there."

"Well maybe you could turn their ambition for you to your advantage. You could follow their advice and see where it leads you."  
"You think I should audition already?" Blaine was taken aback.

"Why not? Rachel has been auditioning and although she doesn't have a part yet she's been in student plays and is using her time wisely. I don't always like her way of doing things but she definitely has drive."  
"And you think I don't?"  
Blaine was sad and Kurt immediately backtracked.

"Oh no, I didn't mean it like that, I promise," he said, "I think your confidence holds you back not your talent. I think the world is missing out."  
"I'm not that good," Blaine said sheepishly as his cheeks warmed up.

"You _are_ Blaine," Kurt said sincerely. "I love that you had the confidence to dance on a stage outside and play piano in a park. I love that you sang a song to help me sleep. Music heals and does wonders for your confidence. You did that."  
"But I couldn't have done all those things without you. I mean you sang on the subway, you believed in me, you gave me the confidence to do all those things."

"Well I'm glad," Kurt said finally, accepting the praise for what it was. "I mean your song for Christmas was a lovely way to show all of that."

The mention of the song that Blaine had sung, after two eggnog at his piano in his dorm on Christmas evening, gave Blaine a jolt and he sat up straighter.

"You liked it?" Blaine whispered.

"Are you kidding Blaine?" Kurt almost screeched. "I loved it. It was perfect and sweet and a great end to such a day. I just felt sad you spent it on your own."  
"Oh I was ok," Blaine said, noncommittally, "I spent it with you in some ways."

"Well I won't let you spend Spring Break on your own, I'll come to New York and we can visit my dad in LA if you like?"  
"You'd want me to meet your dad?"

"Of course, I've mentioned you already and they're going to love you, I'm sure."

Blaine felt a little overwhelmed with all this new information and planning but Kurt seemed oblivious as he drove onwards. There was a lull in conversation where their thoughts took them outside the window and into the future until Blaine whispered a confession that momentarily took Kurt's breath away.

"I sang that song for you," Blaine whispered so quietly, Kurt thought he could still hear the birds outside. "On Christmas day. It was for you, every word."  
The admission caused Kurt's heart to still in his chest though his eyes stayed resolutely fixed on the road ahead. He had hoped that the song was meant for him, that the words showed so much more than just a simple wish for Kurt to enjoy his Christmas. But as the weeks wore on and they didn't discuss it again, it had seemed to Kurt that the moment had passed and they remained friends, which was the most important thing. The idea of explaining it all, telling Kurt the truth, had Blaine's stomach in knots as he held his breath now, waiting for Kurt's reply.

They had gotten closer to the beach that Kurt had in mind but although they were still a few miles from El Matador they were approaching Surfrider beach and Kurt parked the car without saying a word. The sea was a dark blue, its waves lapping at the sand like gentle white horses, and still silent Kurt came closer to the sand as the grass came away. The pier was in the distance and he sat down on the grass, his feet touching the sand as he took off his boat shoes.

"Please say something," Blaine begged quietly, Kurt still looking resolutely ahead but his face changed and he suddenly looked kinder.

"I thought you might have forgotten that night," Kurt said quietly. "I thought maybe you never wanted it to be acknowledged."

"I did, I just didn't know how to say it," Blaine said feeling pathetic and small.

Kurt looked at his glasses that were just that little bit too big and smiled. "It was a beautiful way to say it," Kurt said.

"I would never have had the courage to say it without those eggnogs inside me but I never regretted singing the song."

"And you mean it?" Kurt said, his eyes searching Blaine's, hoping and begging it to be true.

Blaine could feel his head nod as if it was completing the action without his prior consent but he knew the moment needed more. He would have to be brave and admit those words without song, without suggestion.

"Kurt, I have been feeling differently towards you recently," Blaine began, his golden honey-coloured eyes fixed on Kurt. "And I guess this trip just confirmed what I knew to be true all along." He took a deep breath, as Kurt seemed to hold his.

"I think I'm falling in love with you."  
Kurt's eyes widened only slightly but his mouth felt like glue.

As the silence stretched on, Blaine's expression turned to resignation and he sighed.

"I'd like to be friends above all though," he said, "Don't worry about things being awkward, I won't mention it again." He started to get up, brushed the grass from his pants and turned to face where the car had been parked. He didn't notice Kurt had gotten up too. "Maybe it'll be easier when I go back to New York," Blaine carried on until a warm hand touched his elbow and he turned to see Kurt's face extremely close to his own.

"Oh."

Kurt laughed and its musicality made the blood in Blaine's veins sing.

"You should stop talking so much," Kurt whispered, his breath tickling Blaine's lips. He leant in closer to remove Blaine's glasses and just took a moment to appreciate Blaine's warm eyes before he pressed his lips against his. Blaine let his eyes adjust, Kurt's face coming into focus as he responded and continued the kiss. Kurt sighed as they parted.

"I think I'm falling for you too," Kurt said smiling shyly and right then and there, Blaine felt like flying and jumping up and down. He had so thought they would just remain friends. They kissed again, tentatively letting their tongues meet as Blaine wrapped his arms around Kurt's waist to hold him closer.

Once they discovered this mutual interest it wouldn't stop and they explored the sides of their bodies with wandering hands feeling soft, warm skin as they kissed again and again. Blaine looked gloriously kissed as they parted after about half an hour, his lips cherry red and his cheeks flush with the breeze. Kurt smiled.

"You look so gorgeous," Kurt whispered, mesmerised by the sight before him, which caused Blaine to blush.

They decided to continue their journey to El Matador beach a bit further up the coast but hands were entwined the whole way, with each of them sneaking glances at the other every so often as Kurt continued to drive. It felt like a dream, a great romantic dream where people meet their loves randomly on the internet and never part. They walked El Matador when they had parked up, holding hands appreciating the scene before them and taking in the gentle breeze and the sunshine. Blaine knew he had never felt happier. They ate at a little café there, talking about this and that, everything suddenly much more in the light of love, and nothing could burst their bubble.

That was until they walked back to the car and Blaine realised he would be leaving for New York in the morning. Kurt noticed his expression change.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm going home tomorrow."

Kurt's face changed too. "Oh."

"That doesn't change anything does it? I mean we can still talk just as much? Still move in each other's lives?"  
"Of course," Kurt said, "Nothing has to change."

Blaine stopped him by the car and pushed him slightly so his back rested on the side.

"I won't be able to do this though," Blaine said, kissing him on the cheek sweetly. He continued to kiss along his jaw until their lips met again. "I won't be able to kiss you, and hold you and touch you, like this."

Blaine tried desperately to touch and feel what he could as if committing it to memory and Kurt felt his heart stutter in his chest.

"We have a few hours," Kurt whispered, as he struggled to control the moan in his throat. "Let's make the most of them."

X

True to Kurt's word, they raced back to Blaine's hotel and spent the evening ordering room service and enjoying each other's company. They watched a movie snuggled together on Blaine's bed and kissed and touched when they could. It was easier for Kurt to stay, to sleep against Blaine's chest and sleepily text Rachel that he wouldn't be home that night, knowing she was probably squealing with glee and he would have to explain when he got home.

The morning came too quickly and Kurt helped Blaine pack in silence as they wandered around the room. They picked up final coffees and breakfast muffins, taking their time getting to the airport and checking in slowly as if they could halt time. But soon it was time for Blaine to board and Kurt had to let his hand go.

"I'll skype when I get home," Blaine said, "No matter how late."

Kurt nodded.

"And you'll visit at Spring Break?"

Kurt smiled at the thought and nodded again. Blaine's expression softened and he kissed Kurt on the cheek gently.

"It'll pass quickly I'm sure," Blaine said, "It's not goodbye."

"I know," Kurt said, "I'm never saying goodbye to you."  
Blaine hugged him close as his flight was announced and he had to board. It was such a tight hug, Kurt feeling truly enveloped, that when Blaine parted from him, he felt the coldness and rushed forward to kiss him one last time.

"I'm not saying 'goodbye'," Blaine said as he walked closer to the door. "I'll say 'au revoir'." And he waved one last time, blew a kiss and he was gone.

Kurt stood there for a while, thinking about how the trip had gone in a completely different way to what he expected and although he felt sad that Blaine was going, he knew he would see him soon and skype would just have to do for now.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N:** First new chapter since I posted before!

* * *

Skype had never been so limiting.

Blaine did skype as soon as he arrived in his dorm, back in New York, back to the thoughts of college again tomorrow. Brad was out again and he had never been more glad. Talk of what the journey had been like soon turned into what they missed just by seeing only in two dimensions.

"I miss you," Kurt whispered during a lull in conversation.

Blaine had been in the middle of smiling at something they had seen in LA, now his expression slowly dialled down but his eyes twinkled.

"I miss you too," he said softly. "But I'm still here. At least we have this."

"Can you imagine how people did long distance without technology?" Kurt asked, shaking his head at the thought. "I couldn't do it."

"Well we have this," Blaine said, indicating the computer screen, "At least we will always have this."

They were interrupted by an unceremonious bang of the door and a loud 'bye'. Brad was home.

He instantly noticed Blaine and the guy on his laptop screen and pulled a face.

"I so don't want to see any phone sex, dude," he said, landing on his bed ungracefully. "So keep it in your pants."

Blaine ignored the comment but made it obvious to Kurt he was disgusted. Kurt just sighed and shook his head.

"Speak tomorrow?" Kurt asked.

"Yeah, same time?"

Kurt nodded sadly, wishing the conversation didn't have to end, wishing time would hurry up and bring him to New York.

"I miss you," Blaine whispered, coming closer to the screen in the hope that Brad wouldn't hear. But Brad looked over and didn't hide his laughter.

"I miss you too," Kurt said, giving Brad his best bitch stare despite being so far away.

"Bye."

"Goodbye Blaine."

* * *

During the next few weeks it felt like they were two separate halves of a whole. One night each week they tried to have a film night so they would watch the same television show or movie and eat popcorn together as if they were sharing the same bowl. They would comment, bitch about the outfits and laugh and cry at similar scenes so they could almost imagine they were sitting next to each other. Blaine loved to hear Kurt's musical laughter and Kurt would smile when Blaine felt sorry for the nasty characters. They were often disturbed by roommates but when they could ignore, when they could imagine the other right next to them, it was perfect.

They skyped nearly every day, recalling the best things that had happened and they tried to have at least one meal together each day. But it was odd when Kurt rang as he walked along the beach as Blaine took a walk through a darker park or if Kurt would sing Blaine to sleep when it was time for him to eat his dinner. They would have these amazing conversations and it was if they were right next to each other, seeing the exact same things, understanding so perfectly. At other times, they would realise there was nearly three thousand miles between them and they could feel it tangibly like a barrier.

Kurt had a particularly busy week, trying to sort the costumes for a community theatre production as well as learning lines for a college play. He had continued working at a coffee shop and it took all his time away when Blaine was winding down in preparation for spring break. Blaine had been organised with assignments so he could have the time to speak more often to Kurt who he realised was constantly busy. It was frustrating. Never had they been this out of synch.

Blaine called constantly in the hope that Kurt might be able to answer but he often got texts that explained why Kurt couldn't call back and Blaine was left in his dorm room, looking at his blank phone. Occasionally, Kurt would look at his phone as it buzzed, watch Blaine's face appear and just a moment of hesitation and he would decline the call, knowing he didn't have the time.

It felt colder in Blaine's dorm room, Brad hardly ever there and no one to talk to, he felt Kurt slip away and he hated it. He started to leave messages.

The first was deliberately nonchalant so as not to appear too needy but after a while the messages became a little more desperate, Blaine always hoping that Kurt might be able to answer. After a particularly stressful day, Kurt left his own message when he knew that Blaine would be asleep:

"Blaine, you can't keeping ringing or messaging. I know you want to talk but I'm so busy and stressed that this isn't helping. Please understand," he begged. "I think it would be best if I rang you when I'm free." The emphasis was all on the 'I' that Blaine felt his stomach sink when he heard the message. He didn't call again.

Kurt noticed. Despite asking Blaine to not message or call, Kurt missed it when it stopped. He was bogged down with demands on his time and hearing messages in between were always a welcome distraction. It was lovely to hear Blaine's sweet voice even if he couldn't call back. Now there was just silence.

He realised he must have hurt the boy that he was quickly falling in love with but he didn't know what to do about the situation. He saw spring break in his future and longed for that time. Only when he was at boiling point, when just hearing Blaine's voice would have made all the difference, Kurt couldn't get a hold of him. Too many demands had been made about the costumes, an assignment was due in and he had to perform for a critique, which was proving impossible to perfect. He pulled at his normally coiffed hair and screamed.

"Kurt?" Rachel peered round his door looking concerned and he apologised.

"Are you ok?"

"Not really but there's not much you can do about it," Kurt said, looking at the stupid assignment that was staring at him blankly.

"Maybe if you call Blaine?" she suggested quietly.

Kurt looked infinitely sad. "I tried, he's not answering. I pushed him away Rachel, he's got every reason to ignore my call. I asked for space and he's giving it to me."

Rachel nodded. "Ok," she said quietly and with understanding. "Shall I make tea?"

"Yes please," he said weakly.

She walked out to their kitchen, made tea and brought it back.

"What will you sing tomorrow for the critique?"  
Kurt looked like he might scream again. "I have no idea."  
"I was thinking of a few suggestions but then as I made tea, I thought of Blaine and how alone he must feel."  
"Don't make me feel worse…" Kurt groaned as he held his face in his hands.

"No I mean you could make this better with your song. Sing it to him, show him how you feel."

Kurt looked thoughtful and he nodded to himself as Rachel left the tea. It might just work. He thought of the sweet song that Blaine had posted over Christmas, the song that sealed everything and made such a declaration. It wouldn't make it fully up to Blaine but it was a start.

He practiced until it was perfect then set up his webcam to record.

"Hi, this is for Blaine," he said simply, "I'm sorry darling." He deliberately used the term of endearment that had meant so much over Christmas.

_You say love is what you put into it_

_You say that I'm losing my will_

_Don't you know that you're all that I think about?_

_You make up a half of the whole_

_You say that it's hard to commit to it_

_You say that it's hard standing still_

_Don't you know that I spend all my nights_

_Counting backwards the days 'til I'm home?_

_If only New York wasn't so far away_

_I promise the city won't get in our way_

_When you're scared and alone,_

_Just know that I'm already home_

Kurt had always leant towards New York, felt its pull, and knew that he would belong there. But now, as he realized he was singing to Blaine, he saw New York as his future home because Blaine was there. Not long now.

_I say that we're right in the heart of it_

_A love only we understand_

_I will bend every light in this city_

_And make sure they're shining on you_

_If only New York wasn't so far away_

_I promise the city won't get in our way_

_When you're scared and alone,_

_Just know that I'm already home_

Kurt knew he hadn't been there for Blaine, had left him alone but he hoped that Blaine knew, really knew, how much he meant to him.

_When life takes it's own course_

_Sometimes we just don't get to choose_

_I'd rather be there next to you_

_Promise you'll wait for me, wait for me_

_Wait 'til I'm home_

_All I have is this feeling inside of me_

_The only thing I've ever known_

_If only New York wasn't so far away_

_I promise the city won't get in our way_

_When you're scared and alone,_

_Just know that I'm already home_

_If only New York wasn't so far away_

_I will be there every step of the way_

_When you're scared and alone,_

_Just know that I'm already home_

_Just know that I'm already home_

"Not long now," he said into the webcam, his eyes imploring and searching as if he imagined Blaine to be right there. "I'll come early, I'll be there. I'm sorry."

He did what he needed to sort out his last few days in LA, then he booked his flight and hoped that he hadn't ruined everything.

* * *

**Song quoted:**

'Already Home' by A Great Big World


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N**: Final chapter – this is really an epilogue to finish their story together. Sorry it seems a little rushed and I hope you enjoyed reading it. I've started to write a soulmate!klaine fic which I hope to start posting after 'When Doves Cry' has finished being posted.

* * *

Spring break was finally here though Blaine saw people leave campus in droves and wondered what he would be doing with his time. He hadn't contacted Kurt, like he wanted, but he couldn't bear the thought of waiting around either. He had gone out, taken photos, sung in piano bars, anywhere to get him out of his dorm. Kurt was everywhere and nowhere all at the same time and he missed him but he hated the idea that he might be trying too hard. Kurt was busy and he couldn't crowd him with his loneliness. He would back away but he couldn't say it wasn't hard.

He took a water taxi as the sun started to set; the warm embers of the sky just peeking and spreading above the island. Blaine felt a kind of peace there that he hadn't felt in days. There was silence on the water taxi as if everyone on the taxi knew too and understood. They watched and waited with Blaine. He took a few photos and instantly uploaded onto instagram with appropriate hashtags. But the music from his earphones led a certain ambience to the scene ahead of him and he didn't notice his phone lighting up with notifications.

Blaine was still engrossed in his world of music and sunset as he stepped off the water taxi at Battery Park, slip 6. He saw the people and their stories but didn't take it all in, taken in by his own thoughts. Something didn't quite fit in when he stepped forward and he paused.

Kurt was all in black apart from a shocking red scarf tied around his neck. His gaze was a striking blue, his eyes the clearest Blaine had ever seen. He stood still, taking in Blaine without speaking. Blaine almost walked pass. Finally he stood opposite.

"Kurt?"

He couldn't believe he was there, simply standing in the near darkness. Blaine removed his earphones.

"I saw your instagram and knew you were here," Kurt said, smiling slightly at his detective skills. Blaine came closer.

"I wasn't sure if you would come here," Blaine said quietly, the wind howling a little louder. "I thought you might be too busy."

Kurt shook his head. "I would never miss it. Did you see my song?"

Blaine looked confused and Kurt smiled. "I guess not."

"I can't believe you're here," Blaine whispered, the wind causing his eyes to fill.

"I'm here," Kurt whispered, his smile shining. "Take me home?"

"Sure."

* * *

They were silent for most of the way home. Kurt spoke of his journey but he knew if he discussed the busy-ness of the last few weeks then the weak truce between them might disintegrate.

They walked from the subway, the wind swirling around their ears making conversation difficult. Blaine suddenly stopped and grabbed Kurt's hand, making Kurt tingle with warmth.

"You're hands are so warm," he murmured.

"I missed you," Blaine whispered, getting closer. "I'm sorry for being too clingy, I just…"

"No," Kurt interrupted, "It was me, I was too busy and I pushed you away."

"I don't blame you," Blaine said sincerely. "I mean I was a little jealous but I don't begrudge you your success. I wanted to be a part of it all, missed you being by my side. Though we have never had much time…"

"We've always been a part of our lives though and I went from sharing everything to pushing you away."

"I got it Kurt," Blaine said.

"No don't excuse me," Kurt said laughing. "Just let me explain a little."

"We're here." Blaine led Kurt up to his dorm room, saying a silent prayer of thanks that Brad was out of his dorm room.

"Will you watch the video?" Kurt asked and he sat next to him as he turned it on his phone. Blaine's smile grew as he watched, knowing that he was more important in Kurt's life than he ever knew.

"I love that song," Blaine said.

"I kept hearing it and thinking of you. I hated being so busy, I didn't mean to shut you out," Kurt said, taking Blaine's hand in his.

"It's ok, Kurt," Blaine said reassuringly. "I need to start living my life, auditioning for things, trying my best and striving for my dreams once more. I guess seeing you so successful and busy showed me I was staid and trying to be stationary."

Kurt's phone rang furiously, breaking them out of the conversation.

"Rachel," Kurt said, "Are you…"

"Kurt!" she shouted, so loudly that Blaine could hear her through the phone. "They're doing a production of Funny Girl on Broadway! I have to audition, I have to be there!"

"In New York?"

"Of course! Will you still be there in a few days?"

"I think so," Kurt said, looking at Blaine and mouthing the question, to which Blaine nodded. "Blaine says yes."

"Fantastic, I have to audition, I just have to. I've dreamed of that part since I was a little girl."

"But you live in LA." Kurt felt a bit stupid for stating the obvious but it seemed Rachel needed that dose of realism. She paused.

"I know but I would regret not going for it. I can think of the consequences later."

"Ok, well are they open auditions?"

"Yes and I know exactly the song I will sing. Will you help me when I get there?"

"Of course."

They discussed the trip she would take and Kurt finished the call, promising to ring soon.

Once Kurt explained her plans, Blaine looked thoughtful.

"What if she gets the part?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, will she move to New York permanently, leave AMDA?"

"I guess she will have to."

Blaine nodded, the seed sown.

* * *

Kurt discovered New York through the eyes of Blaine in the following few days. It soon transpired that his first trip for Nationals had only been the tip of the iceberg. He saw so much: the secret places where Blaine loved to think and watch, the amazing walkways and streets where the unusual shots could be captured. All the photos and places they had been together through technology hadn't been enough, now Kurt could see it all. If he had thought he felt love for New York before, he was completely wrong. This was where he belonged. This was his home.

Rachel arrived a few days later, preparing for her audition, which went too quickly. No telling if she had gotten the second audition, she returned back to LA, her hopes petering away. It came time for Kurt to return to see his dad in California and Blaine was apprehensive.

"He's going to love you," Kurt said reassuringly. "Don't worry."

And he did. Blaine instantly endeared Burt to himself, watching sports when Kurt hated them, and talking gay politics fiercely. They stayed in separate bedrooms so as not to offend but could easily sneak in for cuddles as they drifted off to sleep.

The morning that Kurt was to return to AMDA he left a sleeping Blaine to make pancakes, finding his dad already reading the paper with coffee.

"Sleep well?" Burt smirked, causing Kurt to blush.

"Dad…" Kurt whined.

"It's fine," Burt said holding his hands up in mock surrender. "You're adults now. Just be safe."

"I will," Kurt said, pouring a coffee for himself and sitting.

"Things serious with Blaine?"

Kurt blushed again, this time with sweet thoughts of his relationship with Blaine. It just felt right in so many ways. He nodded.

"How's it working out with you in LA?"

Kurt's face fell. "Not well, we struggle with the distance and we have another three years of this."

"Can't you transfer?"

Kurt was surprised. He had been having the same thoughts but the idea that his dad was that perceptive amazed him.

"I'm not stupid Kurt," Burt said laughing at his son's expression. "New York has been your dream for years. You liked it there last week?"

"Yeah," Kurt said slowly, his eyes not able to hide the dream. Burt smiled again. "It was fantastic. So busy and crazy but I just felt alive there."

"Then try to transfer. NYADA will have you, I'm sure."

"But what about you?"

"Kurt I know my health was kind of dubious when you started AMDA but I'm better now. You can't live near me in the hope that nothing bad will happen."

"I know but you'll be so far away…"

"Well Carole and I have been thinking," Burt said quietly. "I don't think California is for us. We've been considering going back to Lima."

"Really?" Kurt's face lit up, causing Burt to laugh.

"New York is where you belong. Don't live your life for other people, Kurt. I taught you better than that."

Kurt smiled. Yes, he did.

* * *

As Blaine came to leave for New York, spring break over, the decision hung in the air. Kurt had yet to say anything to Blaine about his discussion with his dad, not wanting to get his hopes up. The thought of spending more time apart seemed to stretch and yawn in front of Blaine. He was quiet, sullen, and Kurt couldn't keep the idea to himself any longer.

"What would you say if I could get a place at NYADA?"

Blaine looked up, his eyes wide in case he had heard wrong. "You have a place at NYADA?"

"Not yet," Kurt said, "But what if I tried."

"I'll honestly love that Kurt, but why would you move?"

"I love New York, I belong there. You would be a lot of the reason but not the whole reason. I wouldn't put that all on you."

"Kurt that would be amazing, I mean I'm really going to miss you when I'm gone and…"

He had started to ramble, Kurt stilling his voice with a touch of his fingers.

"It's going to be hard but we'll make it work. I know I've been really busy but we need to make time for each other until I can move here."

"But we've only just got together," Blaine said after a pause. "You would be moving all the way over here and then stuck if something goes wrong."

"I think we'd be ok. New York is a big place and I've always wanted to live here. Don't you remember all those conversations about New York before? I love it there."

"I can't imagine a time where we'd never be at least friends, does that sound silly?" Blaine asked. Kurt smiled.

"No that sounds perfect."

* * *

Rachel spent more time in New York trying to convince the production staff and the casting director that she would be perfect for Fanny. They eventually agreed and she made the tough decision to completely quit college. She would reapply to NYADA if she needed to later on.

Her decision made, it was much easier for Kurt to apply to NYADA to start his sophomore year there in New York. Kurt and Rachel would move in together and Blaine could join them later if he decided he couldn't stand Brad anymore.

Calls were exciting, messages relayed about interviews and auditions and a life started to come together for Blaine and Kurt in New York. All those times Kurt had dreamed of New York, his place to belong and grow, he had never imagined he would already know a familiar face when he moved there. Now New York had his heart and soul for several reasons. Blaine no longer felt like a fish out of water but continued to build on what he had already learnt about himself.

A new fresh start, a journey to continue and they were now already home.


End file.
